The Last

Why?

What the fuck. That is the first thing that came to mind when I opened my eyes and saw the blinding lights of the hospital room. I wasn't even ashamed anymore that this is like my 5th time here now. Because I actually attempted to do it on purpose and I failed. I was ready to scream at my parents but to my surprise, when I looked to the side, it was the friend. He was there, with me? Why? He was asleep so he was here all night? I must have said something out loud because he suddenly woke up and when he saw me, he immediately hugged me. Was he crying? I couldn't really tell because everything was still dizzy to me. He gave him a small squeeze and then he pulled away.

"Are you ok? Did I hurt you? Does it still hurt?" He pointed at my arms and when I looked at his face, he seemed concerned. It took a few seconds to gather my thoughts.

"Are you..." my voice cracked for some reason and was very wrong timing. I cleared my throat and tried again. "Are you concerned about me?" I raised my eyebrows a bit and to my surprise, he just looked at me with wide eyes.

"Concerned? I AM WAY MORE CONCERNED THAN IT LOOKS LIKE! I was the one who grabbed you in time. I was lucky I knew where you went and grabbed you before you threw yourself off. You know how fucking scared I was when I felt the blood all over you?" His yelling, for some reason felt more soothing than the yelling I receive at home. Maybe he isn't lying about being concerned. I kept my eyes locked on him when he started walking around the room and then eventually left, probably to get a nurse as a few minutes later, one came in. The rest is pretty boring. Just had to stay for a while there until I could be checked out, like those other times.