Venti: @Ei
Venti: @Ei
Venti: @Ei
Venti: @Ei
Venti: @Ei
Venti: Are you cooking again
Ei: why?
Venti: I'm walking to the dorm and I smell something burning
Ei: ...it's not my fault
Ei: I saw Xiangling cooking the other day and I thought it looked fun
Zhongli: crap
Tartaglia: shit
Venti: fuck
Xiao: why did I wake up for this
Ei: IT'S NOT MY FAULT
Venti: @Jean CAN YOU DIAL THE AMBULANCE
Noelle: Shouldn't you dial the fire department first?
Venti: oh yeah
Venti: @Jean FIRE ENGINE
Jean: On it
Barbara: How are we going to fix it?
Ningguang: I'm not paying
Beidou: please bae 🥺
Beidou: I can't cook you breakfast anymore if the kitchen's burnt to a crisp
Ningguang: fine
Kaeya: Stop making us feel single
Diluc: You're just upset that you can't get a fucking chalk man to love you
Kaeya: And you're just cranky that dad di-
Keqing: BOTH OF YOU SHUT UP
Kaeya: -ed
Diluc: I will pick you up and throw you into the dorm kitchen fire
Kaeya: ew no I wouldn't want to be picked up by you, your pickup lines are horrible
Diluc: that's not what I meant motherfucker
Keqing: why do I even bother
Ganyu: I love your persistence bby <3
Keqing: nevermind I know why
Fischl: I smell a most foul and charcoal-like scent issuing from the quaint kitchenette from which we have cooked many fine and scrumptious dishes. By the call of fate, I declare that the kitchen has succumbed to the treacherous waters that is Ei's cooking.
Oz: She means she can smell the fire from her dorm at the other side of the school
Ei: oh that's bad
Xiangling: Where am I supposed to cook now
Xinyan: You could be the new lunch lady
Xiangling: Oooh that would be fun!
Chongyun: Please no
Chongyun: Everything would be spicy
Xingqiu: I'm sure we can get you a few popsicles
Chongyun: Thanks Xingqiu
Yun Jin: 90% sure they're gonna be laced with chili powder
Shenhe: If you put my son in danger one more time, I will not hesitate to give you a slow and painful death
Xingqiu: haha
Hu Tao: DID SOMEONE SAY DEATH
Yanfei: Tao please
Hu Tao: sorry honey
Hu Tao: There's a 20% discount for students
Yanfei: How many times do we need to talk about this
Hu Tao: I need business
Hu Tao: No one is dying and it makes me sad
Tartaglia: That is extremely disturbing
Tartaglia: Can any of you take anything seriously
Mona: My astrology sign says we can't
YOU ARE READING
{GISPC}: Genshin Impact's School Project Chatfic
FanfictionIn a last ditch effort to control his chaotic students, the principal of Genshin Impact's high school got Jean to put all 45 high school students (almost no one else wants to join because they're all not normal) into a group chat. However, from the...
