Heart no Kuni no Rika (reupload)

Chapter Ten: When Something Cries...

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Chapter Ten: When Something Cries...

"Under the darkness, pierced by the feelings that run through me,

I don't need any regret. I'll destroy my fate now."

~ Under the Darkness by C. G Mix

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I woke up in a daze. It took me a few minutes to realize I was in my father's room. My mother was lying down beside me, holding me. She must have come into the room when I was asleep. As the world of the waking began to filter into my eyes, memories of last night's events flashed before my eyes like a tape that was being fast-forwarded. I sat up as if a bolt of lightning had reanimated me back to life. Mother's teal eyes shot open in shock, realizing that I had just awakened. I was panting as if I was out of breath despite the fact I had just woke up a few moments ago. My mother wrapped an arm around me.

"Rika, a lot has happened. Please do not do anything rash," she pleaded with me. I sighed impatiently, if only she understood...maybe she did to an extent, I did not know and for the moment, I did not care.

"Mom, I just witness somebody I love nearly gank his brother whom I'm also madly in love with. I doubt you can comprehend my pain right now," I retorted in a cold voice. She seemed slightly hurt by my tone but pressed on.

"Rika, I have lost people I loved too. I may not have seen them die over and over again as you have claimed. That does not mean that my pain is any less valid than yours. Dum is still alive and thanks to your quick thinking too. I am sorry about you having to experience that trauma last night. I also heard about what you had done to get yourselves out of that situation. I do not blame you for your actions. Blood and Elliot are doing everything they can to figure out who is responsible for this fringe group. Please Rika, do not do anything rash. I am begging you as your mother to take a deep breath and take a step back for a moment. I say this because I care and because I love you," she said in a firm but caring voice. I realized she was right. I apologized for acting cold. She only embraced me in a hug.

"I don't want to see anything happen to you. Neither does your father, Dee, or your uncle. We love you, Rika," she added with a small smile. My blood ran cold at the mention of Dee's name. I was still angry at him for what he had done. I temporarily shoved that off to the side as I hugged my mother back. Suddenly, I buried my face into her chest and the emotions I had held back had come bursting out of me and drowned me in a series of harsh sobs. She released a small gasp of surprise but her hold on me tightened and her hand began petting my head to try to comfort me. I clutched her pinafore tightly as my body was attacked by these gut-wrenching sobs, tears drowning my face with their salty waterfalls.

"Rika, shh, it's ok honey, I promise," she whispered over and over to try to comfort me. She sat there with me in her lap, rocking back and forth as if she was comforting a newborn. However, I was eighteen and here I was, clinging to my adopted mother like a child because my emotions decided to break free and drown me with their sorrows. I guess I had been holding in a lot of shit as I still could not let go of her. As if reading my mind, my mom said, "You do not have to be ashamed about allowing yourself a good cry. Nor do you have to be ashamed about clinging to me when your heart has just been through hell. If I was dealing with that pain too, I'd be hugging my mother too. Its ok let it out. That's what I'm here for."

Her words hit me like arrows in the chest, not that they were painful but comforting. Fresh sobs broke out from my chest as my body shook from crying. She kept rocking back and forth while holding onto me, allowing me to release my emotions without any questions asked. After a while of her holding me and once I felt free from my tears, I sat up and looked at her. Nothing but kindness and love swam in her teal eyes, taking the end of her pinafore and dabbing it under my eyes, drying up leftover tears. Her left hand was still on the small of my back, hugging me close to her. "Do you feel a little better now?" she asked me after a pause. I nodded, too exhausted and my brain was too muddled for words for the time being.