Dancing with Stray Kids | Kim Seungmin

Chapter 11

Tw: slight anxiety attack (nothing too visual though)
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march 2nd 2020 (five weeks later)

Amy PoV.

We were at the "On track" music video making and honestly I had no idea why I was even here. The song doesn't even have a choreo so I don't know what my job will be. I just got a message from the manager that I should also be there. When I asked they only said that some staff members were sick so I had to jump in. Don't ask me, I'm utterly confused.

I was already at the set when the members arrived. "Hey guys. Ready for another shoot?"

"What are you doing here, Amy? There isn't even a choreo....Not that I don't want you here, just wondering" Jisung asked while coming over to me to give me a greeting hug.

"Don't know. Apparently I have to help out because they are lacking a few people." I just shrugged but showed them the way to the Make-Up room. After they got a few instructions we were all together walking around, exploring the area.

"There is a storyline in this video right?" I asked Changbin who was walking on my right.

"Jup. A love triangle to be exact. Minho and Hyunjin will act like they like the same girl and we will put that story in the story of us as a group of students making our own film. In the film Minho and the girl will play love interests and hyunjin will get in the film but in the real life of the film jelous." He exclaimed excited and I had trouble following him. I just nodded and told him how good that idea was. "Who is the girl though?"

"She isn't here yet, I think, I've never met her nor know her name." Changbin answered when Chan decided to join our conversation.

"Our manager casted her. We will meet her later. At first our manager had the idea of using you as the female lead but JYP said your blond hair would stand out too much."

Now I'm confused, my blond hair would stand out too much? What the hell? Not that I even would have wanted this job - I'm camera shy- but I do feel treated badly somehow. I'm overthinking things again - not good, not good at all.

I noticed how the thoughts in my head were pure chaos and I couldn't seem to catch onto one. The only thing I knew was that I didn't knew anything at all. It made me insecure and anxious - I preferred to have things in control and not to be left in the dust.

I tried to breath normally so I wouldn't worry the others but I noticed how shaky my breaths got. I quickly scanned our little group and once I spotted Jisung I went over to him.

"Can I borrow him for a second?" I asked Minho who was talking to him. I was proud of me because my voice was steady and not suspicios of any kind of anxiety attack. Minho quickly looked back and forth between Jisung and I but then left to talk to Hyujin.

"Are you okay?" Jisung asked while carefully placing his hand on my arm.
"No and I hate myself for not being okay!"

"Hey, hey. Don't say that. It's okay not to be okay all the time." He pulled me closer and hugged me. One hand was on by back while the other was gently playing with my hair. I just placed both of my hands on his chest and grabbed his shirt while trying to calm my breathing. "I thought I had it under control. I need to have it under control."

"You are going to be okay. Let me help you, just like you always help me when I get too anxious."

He shortly pulled away to look at me but I simply let my head fall back on his shoulder. He continued to rub my back and it helped. I wasn't as worked up anymore.

"Where are the others?" I mumbled against his shirt, hoping he would still hear me. "Not too far away. At the fountain we passed earlier."
"They can't see me like this. Are they looking our way?"