Hold Me Down

Chapter 4

After failing miserably in her attempt to apologize to Alison, Emily drags herself over to Spencer's, where the girls are meeting to discuss their latest findings about Charles. She doesn't want to go, doesn't want to be a part of whatever ridiculous scheme Spencer has come up with that will certainly lead them nowhere. She just wants to forget about it all. Forget about A and Charles and the goddamn Dollhouse and Alison. Especially Alison.

"Finally," Hanna says when Emily walks in. "You were supposed to be here half an hour ago."

"I had something I needed to do," Emily mutters gruffly. She throws her friend an annoyed look and shoves past her, not in the mood for Hanna's attitude.

Spencer catches her eye and cocks her head to the side to study Emily curiously. As she takes in Emily's disheveled appearance, Spencer's lips pull into a disapproving frown. Emily can practically feel Spencer judging her but she doesn't really care and she doesn't bother to stop herself from rolling her eyes at her high strung friend. She'd like to see how fresh-faced Spencer would look after spending half the night crying on her bathroom floor.

"Hey Spence, you got anything to drink?" Emily asks before Spencer can question her.

"There's water and soda in the fridge."

"I was thinking of something a little bit stronger," Emily says pointedly and Spencer frowns in judgement again.

"Emily, it's the middle of the afternoon," Aria points out.

"Thanks, Aria. I forgot how to tell time," Emily snaps. All three girls look at her like she's crazy and she finds herself shrugging off their concern. "I have a hang over from last night," she lies. "Just need something to straighten me out a bit."

"Think it's going to take more than a drink to straighten you out," Hanna quips with a pleased grin.

"Who were you drinking with last night?" Aria asks.

Emily doesn't laugh at Hanna's joke and doesn't bother to answer Aria's question. "So Spence, do you?"

"Uh, yeah. Under the sink. There should be a bottle of whiskey behind the carpet cleaner. My parents think they're hiding it from me," Spencer says dryly.

Emily nods and enters the Hastings kitchen in search of the whiskey. She pulls the bottle from the cabinet under the sink and stands with a satisfied smile. She needs something to help get her through the rest of the day after her disastrous talk with Alison. She knows Spencer's going to expect her to contribute to the Charles conversation but she can't focus on anything except Alison right now.

The girls are discussing something heatedly in Spencer's living room and Emily hates how this is how they spend their time together now. It feels like forever since they just hung out and talked about something other than A. She wonders what it would be like not to be live in a perpetual state of fear because she honestly can't remember the last time her life wasn't in danger. But she's pretty sure her time in the dollhouse has destroyed any chance she has at feeling safe again.

"Where the hell is Ali? Isn't she supposed to be here for this?" she hears Hanna ask from the other room and her stomach drops. Alison was supposed to be here.

Emily twists the bottle cap off a little more roughly than necessary, tossing it on the counter and putting the bottle directly to her lips. She doesn't bother using a glass. If Ali is coming to this little powwow, she's going to need to get drunk now instead of later. She wonders briefly how pissed Spencer would be if she just walked out with her parents' whiskey. She'd probably have a conniption and Emily certainly doesn't need the drama. Sighing, Emily saunters back into the living room with the bottle swinging from her hand and her eyes trained on the floor.