Chapter 0 - This is fine. (It really isn't-)

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Here I am, sitting in the middle of my burning living room, eating a bowl of ramen.

I really wish I could give you a proper backstory to this scene but the closest you're gonna get is this crappy summary.

I was chilling while watching some memes, when some kid decided to shoot fireworks at my house.

I hope that kid gets their karma.

Anyways, the fireworks conveniently landed directly in my living room, which has next to nothing that's fire-proof.

Knew I should've followed my mind and gotten the fire-proof treatment for the furniture...

That was thirty minutes ago.

"I wonder what's gonna kill me. The heat or the smoke?" I ask myself as I finally close down my suffering laptop.

I could practically hear the thing say, "Thank you for putting me out my misery"!

In that moment, I realized it was getting harder for me to breathe.

As I inevitably collapsed onto the smoldering floor, suffocating, I thought 'I guess it's the smoke.'

~~~~Brought to you by Facewall™. ~~~~

~~~~When your palm isn't enough to contain the fail.~~~~

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⏰ Last updated: Jul 31, 2022 ⏰

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