Is This All You Want? (annyeongz version)

Chapter 3

"What's stopping you?"

Wonyoung wraps one arm around Yujin's waist, trapping her in place. She pulls her rather abruptly till their hips meet, and the little squeal of fear or shock or whatever else Yujin might be feeling spills from her mouth. Yujin leans back so their upper bodies don't suffer the same contact as their lower halves, but, oh, how Wonyoung wants them to feel the agony. Wonyoung places her other hand on Yujin's chin, tipping it towards her. Her breathing is shallow and yet each puff of air smells as refreshing as a summer day, like strawberry iced tea. How is that even possible at this time of day? Wonyoung licks her own lips if only to imagine what Yujin's must feel like.

"What?"

"From having sex with me. You're already paying me. Your rejection is only egging me on, you know?"

"Is it so hard to believe that someone doesn't want to have sex with you?" Yujin rolls her eyes, acting like she has the upper hand here when her voice is shaky, and her blush is creeping up. Even Wonyoung can feel the heat from her.

Yes!

"Are you like, a closeted lesbian?" Wonyoung guesses, "A virgin? Because I don't mind that."

"No, no," Yujin shakes her head, "Neither. Why does it bother you so much?"

"Because this is what I do! Does it bother you?" Wonyoung stares at her eyes now, with an intensity she hopes Yujin can sense. There is no escape from Wonyoung's deathly gaze. That is until she lunges forward, just nearly tasting those soft pink lips. But she can't. Wonyoung slams her hand against the wall because it's the only way she can vent out her frustrations, which was arguably a dumb thing to do because it really did hurt her palm, "Does it bother you when I touch you when I've touched so many others?"

"Don't," Yujin says, barely audible. Is she talking to herself or Wonyoung? She wonders.

Yujin's eyes are darker than usual but still avoiding Wonyoung's own. They're much more intense than usual. Wonyoung wonders who's more dangerous here. Her fists tremble on her sides. They unclench as she exhales, "It doesn't." Yujin pulls on the collar of her own shirt as if it's choking her, "This is just something you have to do, isn't it?" She pulls Wonyoung's hand away from the wall and looks at her reddened palm and starts rubbing it softly till it returns to its normal shade. Wonyoung fights the warmth creeping in her chest as Yujin soothes the pain.

"You're weird," Wonyoung pulls her hand away, pouting at the lack of answers. Is Wonyoung supposed to believe that this will make sense someday? Is she supposed to rely on Yujin's silence and inaction? For what?

"I won't hurt you," Yujin says when Wonyoung has her back turned, "I promise that."

When she turns to look into Yujin's eyes, they're sincere again. Soft and warm. As annoying as Yujin is, for some reason, Wonyoung believes her.

-

Apart from her job at the massage parlor, Wonyoung needs to find a company that offers an internship program and that would willingly accept her. She'd applied to three different companies, expecting at least one of them to tell her she got the job.

Her first rejection email comes a few days after the submission of her CV. It's for a position at a psychiatric clinic. The best students intern there, and they say the pay is good (enough) and the experience is worthwhile. At least the email started with "Great people don't always make the cut." As if that would make it less demoralizing. Wonyoung has to laugh. Though honestly, Wonyoung wasn't expecting to get in. She has good grades, but not the best among her peers.

The second rejection email comes in a week later. It's a Friday night. Wonyoung meets her not-so favorite customer. The girl is busy with work again and Wonyoung doesn't bother asking her the usual questions anymore, nor does she offer her a massage. Wonyoung does, however, throw a few pain relief patches her way.