Nicole

Chapter: 06

Nicole sat down on the couch across from her father, gazing around the open living room. The whole house was airy and wide. Nicole loved it. It was like taking a breath of fresh air again. Again.

She still couldn't get rid of the feeling that she had been here before, in California, in LA, in this house. There was a sense of familiarity but it was faint.

Christopher chuckled lightly before saying, "I don't know how your mother let you come here but-"

That was it. Nicole could no longer bear her father talking about her mother as if she was still alive. She inhaled sharply before saying, "My mother is dead." Her voice was sore and she could've sworn she heard it crack.

Her father's expression was priceless. He had turned white, like that was the last thing he was expecting to hear. Nicole noticed how his hands started shaking and he struggled to control himself. She bit her lip. Her mother had probably meant the same, maybe even more, to him as he had meant to her.

"What?" He managed in a hoarse voice.

"She died. Two days ago. That's why I came here," Nicole fisted her hands, her sharp nails digging into her palms. It hurt, but she didn't stop.

"How?" Her father was breathing heavily.

Nicole closed her eyes and inhaled sharply to keep the tears in. Then, she exhaled slowly before saying, "She was stabbed." Silence fell upon them after that. Nicole was struggling to keep emotion from flowing out of her. If she was going to talk, she was going to do it unemotionally. This man may be her father but she had known him for barely a day and if she broke in front of him like that, he would think that she was weak, that she cried too easily, that she couldn't handle grief well. That wasn't true and she was sure to let him know that.

"Your mother and I," her father broke the silence. "We met in our senior year when we were seventeen. Laura was quite a persistent woman. She wouldn't take no for an answer. She made sure to let people know that just because she was a woman, didn't mean that she was vulnerable.

"I, on the other hand, was quieter than her. The moment we started to get along was when someone tried to challenge her strength. You could say he was rude in the way he did it. That day though, Laura wasn't feeling her best. I'd noticed as it was quite obvious. She hadn't talked much and kept rubbing her temples as if she had a headache. She really didn't seem to be in the mood of fighting him in any way.

"They were in the hallway when it happened, at Laura's locker. And mine was near to hers so, I noticed it. She kept glaring at her but that son of a-" her father inhaled, restraining himself from swearing in front of Nicole. "He didn't stop. His voice rose and Laura's headache was getting worse.

"I may have been the quieter one, but I always stood up when I had to. And as her lab partner, I walked up to them and said a few things that were pride-crushing. So he left. And Laura thanked me. She might not have known this but from that moment on, I had started to develop feelings for her and found myself asking her to senior prom. And she said yes.

"After that, we started dating. Everything was perfect with her. She was like a spark, a light that made everything seem better. We both were happy. And things went on like that until they started to get serious. It took me quite a while to realize it but eventually, I did. I was in love with her.

"When she turned twenty-three, I proposed to her. She said yes within a minute. I thought she might say that she needed time to think about it but she didn't. And the next spring, we got married.

"I felt like life couldn't get better. She was the best thing that ever happened to me. Two years after the wedding, your mother got pregnant with Axel. A few months after he was born though, she started expecting you. A year later, the same thing happened with Isabelle.

"By the time she was expecting Nathan, though, things started to fall apart. I don't know what happened to her. She said she was growing sick of California and we argued very often. It wasn't like her to act like that. This was her hometown.

"I told her that we could leave. Go somewhere else but she didn't want that either. And a few months after Nathan was born, she took you and left. I tried to stop her but I didn't understand why she kept saying that she had to leave, that she didn't have a choice. And most of all, I didn't understand why she had to take you with her.

"I tried calling her after that, not really expecting her to pick up but she did. Although she kept telling me not to call her, she never ignored my calls. A few years later, I stopped trying but I didn't stop hoping. I hoped that she would return but that also started to fade when she didn't.

"My hope was almost dead until you contacted me. I thought that if you'd come, she might come along with you. I kept hoping even when you showed up without her but only till you told me she was dead."

Nicole had been listening intently the whole time she was telling the story. She didn't ask anything nor did she interrupt him. There was something in her heart that opened. It was relaxation. She had gotten all the answers that she needed. The air felt lighter now.

Nicole knew that it was her turn to tell the rest of the story so, after taking a deep breath, she began, "I always wondered about you. As I grew up, so did curiosity. I kept asking Mom who my father was and why he wasn't with us but she never told me anything. She gave me more than she was able to but it was always the answers that I craved.

"I spent years like that. Wondering, asking, and then getting nothing. And I was growing sick of it. But three days ago, I asked her again and she said that she needed time. She'd had sixteen years and I told her that but she said she'd only had thirteen. Then I saw something I had never seen before. I saw her cry.

"She never cried. Ever. But then, she agreed to tell me not all, but a few things the next day. But when I came back from school, the door was open, and when I went inside, everything was a mess. Things were broken and when I went to Mom's room, this man was pinning her to the wall with a knife to her throat," her father winced at that. Nicole continued. "I told him to stop but he said something I didn't quite understand. He said that they didn't forgive mistakes. And then he stabbed her. Right here," she put her fisted hand to the spot below her chest where her mother was stabbed.

"I took her to the hospital," Nicole's voice was small and thin now. Barely even a whisper. "And when I went in to see her, she apologized for the answers that she couldn't give me. And then, she started having trouble breathing. But she kept saying a name. Your name. But not your whole name. Just Chris. She kept saying, "Chris, I need Chris," and I didn't know who she was talking about. Her last exhaled breath was a name," Nicole looked at her father. "Chris."

Christopher inhaled sharply. Nicole saw a tear roll down his cheek but he wiped it away quickly. "She always called me Chris," his voice was broken now and Nicole's heart ached. "Even when we fought, even when I called her after she left, she never called me Christopher. Always Chris and just Chris."

A long silence stretched between them after that but it wasn't awkward in any way. Nicole needed it to keep her emotions locked in the cage in her heart. She had gotten the answers she needed but somehow, she still felt empty. And Nicole realized that that empty place was where her mother used to live.