Most painful Love

chapter 14

CONTINUATION

I slowly opened my eyes

I felt at the corner of my eyes that it was wet.

It's not as quiet as before, what happened? ....

I ran out and went to my wife's room as soon as I remembered.

I hope it was just a nightmare ... a worst nightmare ..

When I opened the door, his room was very clean

I went in and went to his bathroom fighting in case he was taking a bath, but nothing.

I was statuesque where I stand now, a huge picture frame. This is our wedding picture. I'm smiling here while my wife is frowning.

I don't think he framed the picture of the two of us when we got married. I didn't really expect it because this was the first time I entered his room.

He forbade anyone to enter his room.

I need to see Laster, I can't be complacent until I see him ....

I was about to leave his room when I saw something strange on his bulletin.

I saw it before but I didn't pay attention to it.

I immediately went to the bulletin board on the side of his study table.

My heart was immediately broken because of what I read
My heart was immediately broken because of what I read

'Chzean D'vour Bladestra Vicser'

'Laster Haze Vicser'

'Stop hurting her'

'Another sin'

'I'm sorry wife'

'February 15 20 **'

'Alzhiemer's Disease'

'Dementia'

And much more. That’s what was written on the papers pinned to the bulletin board.

There is all the information, the wedding day, my name, my number, his number, the name of his parents, his brother and the words I did not hear from him .....

I covered my mouth and was prevented from sobbing.

On the side of the table he had a thick notebook

I opened it hesitantly

My tears kept flowing down as if they would never stop.

Why didn't I notice?

Why am I like this kat*nga?

October 10 20 **

I committed another sin, I love my wife but why do I always forget about her?

October 11 20 **

Another sin, why do I keep forgetting things? Especially my wife? I always ended up hurting her, again and again.

October 13 20 **

I can't remember a thing, I saw my wife lying on the basement floor, was I the one who did that?

October 14 20 **

I remember my wife, still, I ended up hurting her again. I remember every detail. I saw her with a guy, and I couldn't control my self, so again, I hurt her.

Elloise is my ex but why can't I forget her? She kissed me, and my wife saw it. I hurt her again.

I can't believe my self that I pushed her away and put the blame on her.

Will I forget her after I wrote this?

October 15 20 **

I can't remember .... I just found my self hurting her again. I'm so thankful that my sister came. She stopped me from hurting my wife.

Will I forget things again?

October 16 20 **

I'm always reading my notes, but I can't even say a word, I can't even say sorry for everything I've done to my wife.

October 30 20 **

I started to hate my self, I broke her heart, not just once, twice, or thrice. She's living with an unknown guy. She's living with her husband who doesn't even know her, and that's me.

She left me ... after this, can I still remember her name, her face and her smile again?

November 28 20 **

It's been a month. I have this huge picture frame so I can remember her every time I woke up with an empty mind.

For almost a month, I was left behind. Nothing on my back, just my self. I lost everything. I don't have my wife with me.

My anxiety keeps hugging me .....

I saw her again, at first she looks different. But my heart keeps saying that's she's my wife.

I almost forgot her ... but my heart turned into pieces .. when she signed the Annulment paper ...

I'm always asking my self, why can't I control my self from hurting my wife and continue my life as if nothing happened.

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I-i can't take this anymore ... I close the note and sat on the floor

I hugged my self while crying ... all this time, he was just a victim of the disease ...
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I was crying out loud when someone hugged me from behind which made me cry even more

I immediately faced him and hugged him very tightly

Can I stay with him forever? can we stay up like this forever? I wish I could.

I can't stop my self from sobbing so he slowly pampered my back

"Sshhh don't cry please"

"I'm s-sorry Laster i-i'm s-sorry i'm so--"

"Sshhh don't be sorry for me D'vour" he said softly so I couldn't stop my crying even more.

My chest tightened but I didn't take it.

"Laster" was all I could say and I kept crying

"Please don't cry D'vour, I don't want to see you crying because of me"

"I don't have a wife and I didn't even help you."

"Don't blame yourself D'vour it's my fault"

It is not your fault that you have had this disease

"B-but why? Why didn't you s-tell me?"

"It's because I love you"

You're so selfish Laster, you own what you shouldn't.

I asked "W-why? I want some answer Laster"

"I'll tell you but please stop crying"

"I-i had a n-nightmare"

"It was just a nightmare hush now"

I nodded while still hugging him.

"Do you know how scared I am?"

"I'm afraid that one day all my memories will be gone ... forever ..." she whispered weakly

"I want to let you free, but my heart still wants to be with you even though we are in the midst of suffering."

"Even though my heart and brain are not as one, even if I forget you everyday I will prove you that my love for you will still prevail."

"Can you forgive me for all I've done to you? Can I still fix your broken heart?" then he kissed my forehead

"J-just stay with me" I nodded no matter how hard I tried to stop crying I still couldn't do it.

"I-I won't leave you, even if you ask me every day what I am in your life a-I will never m-get tired as long as I fight k-kalang ha?" I faced him and he gave me a warm smile

I caressed his cheeks using my thumb, no matter what happens I will stay by your side. I promise you that.
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