I just want to get high and forget about life, but every time I get high to forget about life, it wears off in a couple of hours, and everything comes back and bombards me, and it comes back 10x worse, I only have like 3 people I'm keeping everything together for, and sometimes I feel like they wouldn't care if I've tried. Most of the time, I just want to die.
Every time I go to do something, I think about one person, and stop, but then, I realize, they probably don't give a fuck, then all hell breaks loose. I keep staying at my best friends house so I'm not tempted to do something, but then he's there, looking all cute and being him, and it makes me hate myself even more, because I'm just a ugly fat shit that no one would like.
I hate myself.
I want to die.
I am just so done.Please save me.