"love is when he is mean to you but yet you still love him,it's when he ignores you and you still love him,it's when he loves another girl but you still smile and and say i'm happy for you but your actually crushed inside. I think every girl goes through that stage when she is in a relationship,dosn't she?I have and it sucks.Why dedicate yourself to someone and try to be as perfect as can be to him and then be treated in return like crap..like nothing?So basically what i'm wrighting about is how things have been,how I could of restrained it from happening,and what's wrong with some guys period.I once went out with this boy um...bob ( I had to change the name,lol:) and I fell like head over heels for him, people said we were a cute couple and stuff...but at the end of the day I would always see him on top of a different girl everyday. I guess you could say he was a player. One of the guys that walk through the hallways with their head held high,knowing they could get any girl they desired..and it was true. We had an on-again-off-again relationship. We mostly broke up because his friends and my friends included would always tell me they saw him cheating on me and of course I belived them and called it off,but I kept going back to him cause I thought I loved him and probably somewhere deep inside he still had feelings for me but he couldn't stop himself from wanted more girls then he could handle.So it started like this one day I was at lunch sitting with my friends and he came over and sat next to me ,at the time I had no feelings for him,anyways he put one of his headphones in my ear and played the song 'I should have kissed you' by chris brown and imedietly i thought that meant that he liked me (what a retard i was) and from then on i started to like him we were friends way before that but then it changed. We went out like four times.I really liked him,we would go to highland oaks park and walk around,mostly just talk cause I was to shy to do anything else...we would snuggle and stuff and thats about it....now that I think about it and I am actually wrighting it down I truely understand why he would cheat on me I mean if I was him I would cheat on me to.WHAT A BORE.But it's not completly my fault ...he actually admitted that he was a player in one of the stories he put up here.Well back to the story, I remember the first time we kissed.We were at the park walking and then he just stoped me while we were about to go over the bridge and tryed to kiss me ,I'M not gonna lie I was so nervous and creeped out at the same time. I hesitated for a moment and then kissed him ,it felt like it took for ever I then steped back and some lady that was jogging stoped and looked at us I was so imbarrassed!!! I grabbed him and then speed walked back to the school.Worse day ever.we had our bad times too,what couple dosn't?Well our last relationship ended by him telling one of my friends that he cared nothing about me,that he loved her more, that he had no feelings for me..it was all a lie.Everything me and him ever had:( then a few weeks later he left the school and I told everyone that I was glad and that I know longer cared (don't think they fell for that) and it was true I didn't care but I still had a little bit of feelings for him even though he did all that,there must be something wrong with me right?But now I could honestly say I swear to god I have no feeling for him.Okay next topic,I think I could have avoided all this drama with him by never speaking to him in the first place ,by never falling for him,by not falling for his tricks...by acting like he never exsisted the first time we broke up. I had many problems with his exes and his friends and not onetime did he ever have my back.But it's okay cause he said it himeself he uses girls to get what he wants there like his pets...and thats why he is NEVER going to be able to get married, who would want a husband who is not trust worthy,who is going to cheat on you and try to deny it even though you know it's the truth.I guess he's going to be one of those men who live in a elderly home cause no one wants him,cause no one needs him.And I'm sorry but its the truth...You need to get your act togeather.Why do guys like reeling us in acting like they love us,adore us and then just spit in our faces?Why do they want us to run to their every need,to be there for then but they cant do the same for us?Why is it so hard for us to be just the same toward them?Disrespectful,liers,cheaters?I guess we are taught better then that.I was just..Blinded.
