Sleeping beauty | dip (OLD)

Chapter 1 (Rewritten)

once upon a fucking time, in a very far away land was a kingdom ruled by a king and queen. what type of kingdom wouldn't have a ruler?

the queen was resting after getting a baby out of her asshole.

 the people were thrilled about the news and when they found out it was a boy, it was literally the only sentence every where.

the king decided to name the baby philip after the previous king died. how sad.

anyways, the kingdom arranged a party for baby philip.

then suddenly, 4 fairies came uninvited. 

"greetings your majesties." the black haired fairy said as they all bowed down.

the 4 fairies introduced them as stanley, kyle, kenny and cartman.

"we are fairies from south park and we are here to gift philip. no more, no less" kyle said.

at first, the king did not like this idea but he was a simp so when his wife agreed, he eventually said okay.

cartman was first to step in and surprisingly, it wasn't a bad one.

"my wonderful gift for you is that you should never ever feel blue even if the clouds were grey."

"hey that doesn't sound like bad!" Kyle said to cartman.

it was stan's turn to give a gift.

"oh dear child, my gift is the gift of bravery."

when it was kenny's turn, he was blasted across the room and died.

"oh my god! they killed kenny!"

"you bastards!"

suddenly the king of hell came uninvited.

"hi! I just wanted to say congratulations! anyways, wheres the punch bowl?" questioned satan.

"we have no punch bowl sir." replied the queen.

"no punch bowl?! what type of kingdom are you guys running?"

the king of hell was outraged.

"then I shall curse your son!"

satan walked up to philip and stared at him.

"before the sun sets on his 16 birthday, he will prick his finger on the spindle of a spinning wheel
and fall into a sleep-like death! A sleep from which he will never awaken!" the king of hell shouted.

"isn't that kind of cruel?" a man said in the crowd.

for some reason, satan agreed.

"Alright. The prince can be woken from his death sleep, but only by true love's kiss. This curse will last till the end of time! No power on Earth can change it!"

satan left the party unhappy.

"what are we gonna do?" said the queen. the rulers of whateverthefuckisthenameofthekingdom were saddened by the curse.

"kyle still has his gift!" said stan.

"yeah kyle! go and grant him a gift!" eric pushed kyle to the crib of the baby.

kyle was nervous after what happened. wouldn't you?

"if the curse of satan comes true, there come a prince who will give you a true loves kiss!" it was hella creepy as it would be kissing someone without consent and who is asleep. we don't know what satan was thinking about but oops?

~Meanwhile with satan~

the punch bowl was not only the problem on that day, he had an arguement with his wife that might result in a divorce...

after the arguement, they finally agreed they were not in love. and it was true. turns out, satans gay. what a surprise.

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Remade this chapter. I didn't like the original.