The Curse of the Gift

Part 15

Tayana

"I don't understand..." I cover my face with my hands, trying to digest what I just heard.

"Are you sure?" Ryan asked nervously. Allan just nods his head, keeping his eyes on me.

"Why me?" My voice trembled, and the cool breeze sent shivers through my body, making me shudder a little.

"I don't know," he sounded angry and frustrated.

The guys are still discussing something, but I can't hear their voices. I'm sure there's something I've forgotten. Something very important, something I should not have forgotten. It lies quietly somewhere in my memory, in the darkest place. And I can't get to it. I walk, but it feels like I'm standing still. And it has absolutely everything to do with what is happening now. This is the answer to all our questions.

I feel my head starting to hurt. I still hadn't fully recovered from using my powers. It was the first time, not counting the training with Marian, that I'd used them. So I was getting tired a lot faster than I should be.

Noticing my condition, Allan suggests we end there, and take a break. I have a fleeting urge to ask him to stay, but I'm sure that even coming here for a few minutes wasn't easy for him. He has enough to worry about right now, so I don't want to cause him any more trouble. And the realization that he could easily have been sent to the dungeon with me, because he was protecting me, hurt my heart. So I bite my tongue and just stare at his receding back.

Ryan hands me the green slurry again, and I drink it without disgust. When I'm alone, I start to think hard about what we're going to do.

Robert is after me, not Marian. And as long as she's in the palace, she'll be safe. Especially since Alan is there all the time, and I'm sure he won't let her get hurt.

My situation is deplorable. I'm wanted for the murder of the King, which I did not commit. I am too weak, and it will take me some time to fully recover. I don't know what I'm capable of yet, or how much energy I have. I know I can heal myself, but I'll have to use up my energy again, and I'm running out of it.

And Joshua... I don't understand his motives. If my dreams are memories, then that boy might as well have had them. Except I have no idea what happened after I rescued him. And I'm sure it's in those hidden memories that all the answers lie. Something happened. But I can't remember what it was.

Toward evening, Izaya comes into my room. He's clearly agitated about something, because he keeps fixing his frizzy hair. I don't say anything, just keep watching as the man circles around the small room. And when our eyes finally meet, we understand each other. We're thinking the same thing.

I just shake my head sadly, and turn my head to the window.

"I can't remember anything," I rub my eyes tiredly, and I hear the man sigh in despair.

"Maybe we can find someone from your family and ask..."

"My whole family is dead," I answer too calmly.

I don't know if it's good or bad, but I no longer have the pain and anger I felt at the mention of my family. It's just a memory now. Sad and painful — but they're in the past.

I don't turn toward my friend because I know what I might see there. He's sorry, but he wants to help, and I'm sure he'll do anything for it.

"I'll try to remember," I raise my head toward Izaya, and the guy looks at me with a furrowed brow and a worried look on his face.

He just nodded in response, and walked out of the room just as quickly.

Remember, huh? Except it's easier said than done.