Heat Brought Us Together

Chapter 3

Her Pov

Penelope Davis

On a Saturday morning as I gaze outside the window, from my car, people and trees pass by in a second before the next one fills my eyesight. 
My mind wanders to something deep in everyone of us, the thoughts about our future, the immediate and the distant one. It unknowingly creates creases on my forehead, signaling constant worry and the fact that I am disturbed over something I have almost full control over. I am a firm believer of the notion that your actions, choices, emotional capabilities largely affect your further paths.

Why did I end up here, how did I end up here, such questions hound many of us, answer very simple yet heartwrenching and need the necessary emotional depth to decipher it. The emotional crevices of an individual can ramp him/her at places, difficult to return from, making the journey back so calming and almost spiritual. For me, gut plays a very important role, the instincts being my guiding light through and through.

Why are some choices so soul crushing and others so trivial, where we don't even bat an eye. Our surroundings, upbringing and the situations make some things neutral, and deciding to do those, a natural phenomenon, one not frowned upon or questioned at any corner.

Deciding about someone let alone myself, is a daunting task, where the decision taker is equipped or not, doesn't matter, because he/she is at the mouth of opportunity, urgency and need.

This decision that I took those years ago to leave, to abandon my family, is a constant thought I have at the back of my mind. The regret and the emotions never leave me. The new me in this city is a burdened and drained me who needs to feel and live like a normal woman. Hence I need these boosters time and again to breathe and satiate my aching heart.

Emotions, feelings, ones thoughts these are in our control? Right?
This is what I thought, my anxiety keeps me at bay, the background keeping me awake and always on high alert. The restlessness is dense and the willingness to isolate in full force. Why can't I put a happy face, keep my demons locked and emotions concealed, it is so easy for many but a vividly arduous task for me.

Several million such emotions run through me as I pass the check point of my pack. My home, my abode, my people and my family await me.

We do not wear our emotions or a nasty mood as battle scars, we hide them as best as we can. Excuses act like sand and bury the fire within us, leaving not even ash behind.

The living emotions buried, make the person a ghost, a walking zombie as he faces the world's next adventures.
I wish people come up with applications where the device can display a person's mood and sleep habits on the heart of his sleeve. For all to read, to make a note of it, and behave accordingly. This is wishful thinking, I know.

I park the car in the garage and take a minute to gather myself. I fix my hair and apply little lipstick to my dry lips, as I apparently forgot my chapstick. Great. Dry lips at this ceremony. As if anybody is going to notice that.

I quickly grab my duffel bag and exit my vehicle, automatically ending this monologue that I have going. Solitude in a land full of humans, away from my wolves  has made me into a journaling and diary writing individual.

I see my father smiling brightly as he exits the house and gallops towards me. He is dressed casually, with his gray hair now giving him the perfect look.

My father Matthew Davis is the reigning Alpha of my pack. Today is his last full day as Alpha and I was never going to miss this.

I quickly run towards him and hug him. " I missed you dad, so so much." I barely reach upto his shoulders, so I fit perfectly between those safe arms. "I missed you too my daughter. How have you been?"
He says while patting my head.

"I am fine, don't you worry about me. The gray on you is getting me worried. Stop worrying about your kids, papa" I say.

"That's my job, you two kids and the pack are always on my mind, child" He replies.

"From tomorrow let Jake worry about the pack, dad. Let him handle this, his own way. You retire and settle in the other house, dad, I insist." We continue the conversation while walking inside our house.

This house, the feel and the interiors only remind me of one person. My mother and the Luna of this pack.

Tomorrow this pack will get one Luna and Alpha, a whole set. A couple and a  parent like figure. My brother Jake and his mate Emily.

For years they just had my father, a burnt out widower, a fighter carrying this responsibility alone.

I ask my father as to where my brother and sister in law are." They are overlooking and helping for tomorrow's ceremony near the clearing. I have mindlinked them, they will be here shortly." He replies.
I nod okay and explore the kitchen near our living room. Emily has made a few changes to this setup. I have always found a good friend in her.

She and Jake will make amazing leaders. Jake is trained for this since his early childhood. Eventhough Emily is not of alpha blood, she will shoulder this responsibility head first, I am sure.

My father tells me stories or gossip about out pack members and our beta family. I find a banana and start eating as we sit in the living room talking whilst waiting for my brother and sister in law.

"P" I hear a loud noise as my brother storms the living room. He picks me up and laughs in his throaty voice. "My little sister, oh I missed your heavy ass. You look skinnier P." He says.

"I missed you J. How are the preparations going? I have not lost weight, you have gotten bulkier, two full grown a
Alpha wolves won't stand a chance against you, my brother." I reply.

"Common in, Emily" my brother ushers Em to come and meet me. I hug her and we talk about Jake getting heavier and about the pack.

I then, excuse myself to go to my room. I only have a few things here. A small one person bed and few other necessities. I do have one blanket that I carry everywhere, my mother's blanket which I like to cuddle to sleep, just like an infant clinging to a mother's breast.

Sleep comes easy to me. My wolf is now happy to be home, an early morning run a definite possibility for him.

1155+ words

Love,
A