STUPID DEEP | YOONMIN

ONE

Every artist needs an inspiration when making an art. May it be a poet, a painter, a musician, a writer, or even a composer.

But above the inspiration, there is passion.

They said you will love your job when you are passionate about it.

They said passion is the key to a successful life.

But what will happen next if you suddenly lost your passion?

Yes, you love your job. 

Yes, you wanted to do that job.

But what will happen if the passion is not there?

Or

Was it really the passion that is lacking?

Or you are just trying to achieve a dream that is not meant for you.

Yoongi sighs as he drops his things when he arrived at his apartment. He went to the kitchen to quench his thirst.

It is not the job interviews that is draining him. It is the bunch of promises of "We'll just contact you if you're applicable to this job." Or "We'll contact you."

He went to his room to change his clothes and maybe to have some rest, too. But his thoughts are full of questions.

Yoongi loves making music since he was young. Hell; he can make music while sleeping so he doesn't understand why.

Why are they not hiring him? He makes music as a whole; he composed the lyrics, he made the beats, everything. He just needed a singer.

He just wanted to carve his name in the industry.

But it's always the "Something is lacking." Or "K-pop groups and soloists want an uplifting song. Yours is just too deep and raw."

Two rejected job interviews are normal but fourteen? He doesn't think so.

They say "Try making an uplifting song." So, he did.

But he still gets the "It's too deep. Your beat is uplifting but the lyrics are just too deep."

Yoongi feels like he does not fit in.

Was it his artistry that is lacking?

Was it his passion?

Was he not doing his best enough?

Yoongi paid a glance to his three portfolios that are full of his songs. He composed fifty songs in total, but none of them get accepted.

"Am I pursuing a dream that is not for me?" he whispers.

His ringing phone caught his attention. It must be his Hyung so he answered it without looking at the screen.

"Yoongi-yah."

Yes, it was his Hyung.

Yoongi hums.

"How's the job interview?"

He sighed.

"It's getting tiring, Hyung." He dropped his body and stared at the ceiling. He feels drained.

Seokjin hums on the other line, "Then rest. You don't have to apply every-"

"What if it's not for me?" Yoongi cuts him off.

"Running in a maze that has no end is tiring. Pursuing a dream that is not for me is tiring." He continues.

"If you are tired, then rest. You don't have to keep on running, Yoongi. If you feel drained, then recharge. Life is not a race."