An Easy Guide to World Domination

3. In which demon possession is no joke (your life totally is, though).

"I will try."

Those words, softer than marshmallows, resounding in the space between the two of you - they don't belong to you. This is the only thing you can think about - somebody spoke those words, somebody promised to try, somebody that wasn't you.

No, scratch that, you're pretty sure of this - like hell it was you. It simply couldn't be you! Somebody else's treacherous lips spoke those three words aloud; somebody else's tongue was full of the bitter taste of coffee; somebody else's sanity just dropped down to zero.

Not yours.

Yet the one Kitagarashi-san looks at is you, his lips twitch in something akin to approval, and the words he utters are directed toward you, "I'm glad to hear it, Date-san."

Dear sir, you are no longer using that name. Date [Name] is now gone, dead, killed in action, haha, how utterly tragic. Anyway, the details for how or when are not important. The funeral is not happening, for the body was never recovered. Late Date-san wrote her last will, leaving everything to err, leaving everything to Bruno ( surname-to-be-determined at a later date).

Surprised? Shouldn't be. Yeah, it's not like [Name] would leave anything behind for Atsumu, not after the boy motherfucking kidnapped her. Osa-chan? Well, Osa-chan can take your - hers! You mean hers, not yours! - secret stash of snacks - no, wait, those are your limited edition Chupa Chups and Cherry Blossom Pocky, you are not giving them to anyone.

Oh, yeah, Bruno, your new identity. Yup-yup, your head bobs up and down as you conclude that being Bruno sounds perfect right now. People don't talk about Bruno; people don't talk to Bruno; people don't abduct Bruno.

Also, also, also, if that's not enough (and it totally is), he's seven feet tall. We no speak Americano; you're Japanese, you use the centimeter scale like every self-respecting human being on this planet which means you have no idea what seven feet tall really means. Nonetheless, that does sound impressive.

Not to mention the cute rats perched atop his back!

Honestly, you never understood how people can dislike such adorable, small creatures. It's not like they incited a plague that killed one-third of Europe's population during the Medieval Era.

Oh, wait, this is not time to think about that - your fight for the rights of little, adorable rodents can wait a few more hours, or well, days. After all, if you don't survive this encounter, there's no way you can defend them.

Ding-dong, current objective: Survive.

Okay, how do you do that?

Well, changing your name and escaping to Argentina may be a good first step. That worked for the nazis, right? Wait, you probably shouldn't follow in the footsteps of your Motherland's enemies, babushka would hate you for that.

"Although, I do think we should change our approach."

Visibly wincing the moment this voice reaches your ears, you turn your gaze toward the person you nearly forgot about - or well, toward the person you really would want to forget about. The captain of Inarizaki Volleyball Club remains calm and impassive, not understanding that the dear Date-san he met an hour or so ago is long since dead. He's straight-up snorkeling in the Nile at this point. How sad it is to not let go of somebody's death? Well, it's not like it's your problem!

Only, it definitely is.

Whatever he wants to say next is interrupted by your loud groan. Hiding your face in the palms of your hands, you take a deep breath, reminded of what you've just said. I will try, unfurls itself in front of you gently - delicately - knowing fully well that if it does appear too rapidly, your frail heart would simply break.