Where the Mountain Meets the Sea

Chapter 16-Anong

In the weeks leading up to my graduation I found myself with nothing much to work on. The problem with being intelligent, I always finish early and have nothing to do. So I came home early one day. Som worked on his writing at home and he worked on it most of the day getting in extra books to release after he gets busy with school, so I tried to be quiet not wanting to disturb him.

As I was walking towards my room, I could hear sounds coming from Som's room...did he have someone here? It sounds like moaning, someone having sex. I walked closer to his room after dropping my bag just inside mine. Curiosity was killing me, I needed to get closer. My heart tightens in my chest at the thought that he may not be alone. All these years he has never dated and I have been thankful. That would be just too painful to bear but what am I hearing now?

With every foot fall I got closer, and the moans got louder. This is definitely the sound of sexual pleasure...I could only hear one voice, but I couldn't be sure it was P's, could it be porn? His door is open and I was surprised by this. Normally he keeps it closed while he is in there. As he came into view I could see him on his bed, naked stroking himself. I watched the beauty of his muscles moving, eyes closed obviously lost in his fantasies. I was entranced by him, I couldn't walk away...he was incredibly sexy, drowning in ecstasy...I couldn't stop myself from standing there and watching.

Hand working up and down at a fast, rough pace while the other played with his nipples...Judging from his face I think he was close. I'm not sure what I want more, to stay and see this out or to go and give him his privacy. I'm feeling lost in the moment. I'm drawn in by his erotic display.

His body begins to shutter and as he finds his release, powerfully, almost violently hard, he cries out a name...

My name...

What the fuck.

I quietly dash over and into my room, gently and silently closing the door. I began pacing back and forth, raking my fingers through my hair. What was that? Was he fantasizing about me? That must be it right? I look back in the direction of his room with an upset look on my face...

Don't get me wrong, I'm not mad about him using me as his fantasy material after all I also use him in mine. I'm having trouble understanding though...If he is also attracted to me, then we could have been having sex together for at least the last two years, why the hell am I living like a monk?? A monk with toys, yes but still a monk. I look back in the direction of his room but this time with a look of disgust.

THIS GUY!!!

Why does he always do this shit, being so altruistic? He always denies himself if it pleases others, especially me. Stop denying yourself Som, what if I want it too? If I know him at all, he won't say anything until I have graduated...High School at least, if not University. I don't know if it's because of everything I went through growing up or if he just has trouble seeing how much I have matured and aged since we met...He still treats me as a child, unable to make decisions properly for themselves.

Sometimes Som will still treat me as a kid who needs protecting, but whether he likes it or not I'm a grown man now. I sit on the bed and think things over. If I don't want to wait to have sex until I'm 30 I should act on this, and soon. Why would he reject me if he also is interested? Right?!

I have come to a decision, I will wait until grad to see if he brings it up himself but no longer...I'll go for him myself if he doesn't make a move.

The sight of Som as he finished, head thrown back, back arched, trembling and exhausted, will feed my fantasies until the time where I will hopefully get a taste for myself. He was incredibly sexy in that moment.

On the day of graduation, Som takes me out for a nice dinner and I convince him to go for a walk in a nearby park. It was a beautiful place with couples walking everywhere. I suggested it mostly because I hoped being in the park would make him brave, make me brave. Just because you fantasize about someone doesn't mean you want a relationship with them. In this area it was just us. I had to do it here, so I had to start the conversation. I didn't want us to just get lost in routine if we went home first, it would be so easy to just put it off. I don't want to wait anymore. I took a breath and hoped I could sound more confident then I felt.