Prelude To Forever ->> Larry Stylinson. L.S.

5.

He never understood the want to be partnered up until this very moment. Maybe having someone have your back and keep your failures kept safely between you was worth the possibility of eventual pain.

“Aww, Louis took pity on a Gaby!” Niall swooned, voice as syrupy as can be.

“Short for Gay Baby I presume?” Harry laughed.

“Look at that. Our Gaby’s growing up!”

Everyone laughed but Louis noticed a bit of Harry’s smile falter just a bit. Before he could ask Harry why, the waitress had made her way back with their food and Louis made a mental note to ask Harry later. Harry recovered spectacularly, though and continued on during dinner like whatever made him react never happened.

Louis wanted nothing more than to pull Harry away and check with him to make sure he was ok. Maybe he was just being over protective as Harry himself let it go, but Louis couldn’t help but feel something very close to guilt. Instead, he made a mental note to ask Harry later and tried to enjoy the rest of dinner.

Once the bill had been split and Louis and Harry fought for who was going to pay for who, they made their way back to Pride.

This time Harry hung back with Louis, quietly slipping their hands together.

“You okay, Sunshine?”

“Me?” Louis asked, surprised by Harry’s question.

“Yeah. You got quiet during dinner. Did I...was something wrong?”

Louis stopped dead in his tracks.

“Harry, are you kidding me? No. You did nothing wrong. I was worried about you, though. I noticed something about what Niall said to you made you sad? Upset? I’m not sure what exactly, but I know it didn’t sit a hundred percent okay with you but you let it go so I tried to, too”

“You...you noticed?”

“I did. And whatever it was, I’m so sorry.”

“You don’t need to apologize, Louis. It wasn’t that big of a deal.”

“Can you tell me? Only if you want to, that is,” Louis added onto the end quickly.

“It’s not that big of a deal. Honestly. It’s just that my whole life, I got teased for being different. I was always picked on for being sensitive and soft. I’ve been called Fag more times than I care to admit.”

“I can definitely relate to that,” Louis sighed. He hated that Harry had to know that kind of hurt, too.

“Yeah, well. I went to a small high school where it was impossible to not know every single kid in my class. Secrets weren’t something we were afforded, all knowing each other since kindergarten. When I realized I wasn’t straight, I...I didn’t have a tribe of any sort. I was very alone in my experience and everything I had ever been told was being gay was wrong. It was wrong. I was wrong for being gay. So I over compensated.”

Louis reached out to tuck a stray curl back into Harry’s headscarf. Words didn’t seem sufficient in the moment so he just smiled, understandingly. Harry smiled softly back at him in thanks.

“Anyway, Between my junior and senior year, I went to the gym every day. I lifted weights, I ran. I was the asshole that drank protein shakes like they were my job. When I came back to school fall of senior year, I made it my mission to hide being gay as a matter of survival. I slept with girls. A lot of girls, all while being miserable because I just...I was lying to everyone, including myself.”

“Harry-”

“No, it’s okay,” Harry cut him off. “I wasn’t...I wasn’t sad about what Niall said. I am a baby gay because I couldn’t just own my authentic self. I looked around at all of you and I just felt sad that I never..Louis, what you guys gave is incredibly special and I’m so thankful I got to experience what unconditional kinship is like, even if just for the day.”