The Crackhead Cult.

ⒸⒽⒶⓅ ①

by Ash_k00kie

HELLOW everyone and welcome to the first entry in the sacred texts of this honorable cult.
Today I'd like to introduce our beliefs and set the mood for the many crackhead-ed entries to come. 

The concept is to talk about anything and everything, and by everything we mean EVERYTHING.

 I've been in a dilemma recently and it's been pretty serious. 

A few days ago when a friend of mine told me she'd been spying on me through the eyes of my teddy bear I got curious and in desperation I called her up to ask her a serious question that had been on my mind for atleast a whole year.

 She obviously did not pick up. 

 But I had seen it coming, so I decided to text her and ask her the million dollar question. 

                                                                                                                    'Are my cats really planning a secret revolution?' 

Now the idea sounds stupid but think about it.

 The signs are all there.

I have three cats and they're always huddled in corners in groups in our rooms and when we enter they either run away or flop onto their backs and stare at you. 

 'It seems unlikely'
 

She just didn't get it. 

'Well what do they discuss so secretly then?'

They don't even talk in their secret cat meetings, they just stare at each other until someone enters the room. 

They've developed greatly in the cat society.

 They've learned how to open doors. DOORS. 

'They're communicating in cat telepathy.'  

She's a little slow. 

It's okay. 

 Another reason why I believe they're scheming something is because they're always trying to run downstairs (they're supposed to be on the first floor only). 

They plan missions to escape to the ground floor and when they succeeed, they walk around, map the entire area and run back upstairs.

 'I'm sure.' 

Gosh she really doesn't get it.

'They know they have no business downstairs,

they've been there millions of times and 

gotten nothing out of it yet they keep doing it.'

I'm disowning her if she doesn't get it anymore.