Outcast (Camp NaNo 2015)

Chapter 8

It took five hours for my skin to return to it's normal light purple. In the mean time, I reviewed my native language like a student studying for a foreign language exam. I was scared. What if I forgot something important?

My hands were shaking so much that I almost couldn't fasten my boots. The ship tilted and I fell, tears falling from my eyes without warning as I scraped my arm on something sharp... something black and filled with lead. The pencil. My stupidity with Blair. How did I ever think I could just cast this out of my mind after only a few hours. I put my foot on the ground, kneeling on my other as I struggled to fasten the straps again.

I cursed as the straps broke one by one. It was only forty five minutes until I landed and I was still an utter mess. This frustrated me to no real end. Whatever had made me think I was ready to go back was wrong. It was terribly wrong. Yes, I had better control over my psychic abilities, but that didn't mean I had control over everything else! And here I was in the middle of space crying over spilt milk that I had no way of cleaning up.

I wiped away more tears and tried hard to steel myself. If Ikshed was gone, then that meant I was next in line to rule. I had to prepare for everything because I had to rule an entire area that might as well have been Sanurs' equivalent to Russia in size. I was in charge of the affairs whether my people liked it or not. That was a scary thought all around.

I removed my boots and went to my small closet of clothing, choosing a pair of knee high brown laced boots. I paired it with a pair of tight black pants and a patterned short sleeved top. I looked at my reflection in the mirror and decided to braid my hair to keep it out of my face. It was a task to keep my mind occupied more than anything. Focus had to be away from thoughts of Sanurs, Ikshed and Blair or I would stay hovering just outside of the atmosphere like this for a long time. I hit the switch to start the descent onto Sanurs and waited with baited breath. I had taken precautions a while earlier and locked up Blair in another small force field out of my immediate sight so that when I started my descent around this time, he wouldn't be sent flying across the ship.

The ship shook as it made its descent. I buckled myself in tightly to make sure I didn't get injured because I had the same chance of flying across the ship as Blair did. Gravity didn't pick favorites.

I watched the exterior camera view as the surroundings blurred past. My stomach knotted in nervousness as the automatic landing started to kick in and slowed the building momentum. I undid my restraints now that I would be safe. I almost couldn't believe that I was really doing this. The door opened automatically before I could stop it and various onlookers looked in with curiosity. It was all I could do not to shut the door and turn them away. I felt like my legs had a mind of their own as I moved forward and away from the comfort of my ship. I felt their eyes on me as they tried to figure out if I was really one of their own and if I was, who I was-who I belong to and where I belonged. There was a lot of pressure from this point on.

I heard the whispers and murmurs around me, reminding me way too much of what I was coming. I had already dealt with one death today, I didn't think I was in any state to deal with another, especially not my father. It didn't matter that I had been expecting it for months, it still made tears prick at the corners of my eyes and from the talk, he wasn't even dead yet. That was the kicker: the knowledge of his imminent death because he wasn't even well enough to rule and so one of his advisers had taken over.

Unfortunately memory was good to me and I remembered the wicked, red robed man who had 'helped' my Ikshed rule. I didn't hear anyone give the adviser a name, but I knew it was him.

I sped up my pace and walked straight for the palace as I knew that's where I'd find Ikshed. As I walked through the market, however, I felt surprised that I was being jostled just as much as the next woman. Although I knew I shouldn't be surprised at this because I was wearing commoner clothing and I hadn't been seen since I was five years of age, somehow I still was.