Bed & Breakfast

Ch. 19 Without Him

*** Andie's POV ***

I knew he needed to go for the kids' sake. I hoped that he wouldn't make me choose because I think I would have gone, abandoning my grandmother's legacy. And for what? I tried to convince myself he wasn't worth it. That they weren't worth it, but my heart refused to play along.

Lou and I laid in each other's arms until daybreak. Neither of us slept, although we pretended for the other's sake. When he carefully slipped out of bed and got dressed, it took everything in me to stay still. Especially when he leaned in and left a gentle kiss to temple, the wetness from his face trickling onto mine. How I kept it together was beyond me.

But I did until I heard the door creak shut. I then curled into a ball in my bed and instantly felt the crushing fear of loss. Would I ever see him again? The kids?

The heaviness locked me in place. It felt like when I lost my parents, my grandmother, but also different. This wasn't certain like their deaths had been. It was almost more cruel knowing that Lou and the kids lived and we just couldn't be together.

In my grief, I must have fallen back asleep. I awoke, feeling more tired than before especially when I realized that he was really gone. An unfamiliar agent met me at the house with sympathy in his eyes, but I just went about my usual routine, albeit a bit slower and without a smile.

"Joel suggested closing for the rest of the season. He can take you to be with them." The new agent offered.

I stared blankly at the reservations log that had nearly every room booked through late October. I shook my head wordlessly. Had Lou asked, I probably wouldn't have hesitated. I'm glad he didn't make me choose.

***
Five months later ...

"Where do you want this thing, Andrea?" Wade grunted as he maneuvered the large bundled Christmas tree through the back door.

"I told Bennett that I wasn't putting up a tree this year." I said, watching the snow rapidly accumulating out on the front lawn.

"And he said that's nonsense. You love Christmas." Wade argued. He sighed when I didn't budge and tried a different tactic. "He's just trying to help get your mind off everything that's been going on. Let's just amuse him, huh?"

I looked at Wade. He was dressed for the station, although it wasn't clear if he was coming or going. He obviously made a special trip for his best friend. Given Bennett's position and proximity to law enforcement, he heard what had gone down over summer. He paid me a visit to check in and had kept it up ever since. I never opened up fully about the situation, but he could tell that I was hurting and he was being a good friend. I knew he wanted more, but he was respecting my needs and wasn't pushing.

The fact of the matter was that I was waiting. Stan had finally been taken into custody and charged. The trial had yet to start, but the agents finally stopped trading off on who got to stay at the inn. But even with the immediate threat removed, I had yet to hear from the Cappadonna family. Maybe I never would...

"Fine. Let me get the tree stand." I begrudgingly agreed.

I rooted around in the attic for a bit, finding all sorts of memories before finding the rickety tree stand. As I clomped down the stairs, I spoke loudly to Wade. "I'm not sure that this thing is gonna hold that behemoth. Maybe I should just put the tinsel tree up."