one last chance

chapter five

CHAPTER FIVE LONDON ENGLAND

Spike and Xander walked down to the basement cafeteria. Xander giving a mini tour along the way.

"We don't take up to much space. We generally have thirty to fifty, once there was sixty, kids. The Cleveland school that Faith heads is a bit bigger. All slayer students live on campus no matter the age. The watcher students live on campus if their under 18 or if they go to university they live on campus there. Some of them rent flats. Right now we have twenty kids living on campus. Fifteen slayers and five watchers. The house next door we converted into dorms. It's a bit tricky sometimes with the guy watchers but we remodeled the basement for them. Right now for watchers we have ten guys and five girls. All watchers on campus are guys. The small gym like you saw is on the main floor, the room we use as a classroom and the library take up the second floor, all of our offices the top floor, the basement is the cafeteria that doubles as the large training gym. We all pitch in with everything depending on what needs to be done. Willow generally teaches the magic theory and practice classes, Giles, well you know Giles. I'm generally the all around handy man. Keeps our costs down. Willow and Kennedy live a few blocks away, I rent a flat and Buffy, Dawn and Giles live across the street."

Spike knew Xander talked to avoid the conversation they had to have once they reached the cafeteria. He wouldn't admit it but he was glad to hear what was going on. He was surprised at how organized they seemed, but then again Giles was in charge so it shouldn't have shocked him at all. From the outside of the school you would never guess what went on. The building had once been the city home of a count. The Scoobies remolded the large house to fit their needs. It was an impressive sight.

Arriving to the cafeteria the pair discovered all of the slayers and watchers besides Dawn gathered around the tables chatting. Once they noticed who walked in the room fell into a hush. Slowly whispers started trying to guess what was going on.

Finally one of the students, a watcher, walked up to Xander. "Are we patrolling tonight? What's the deal?" he asked.

"Don't worry Tom. You guys have a free night. As you've all figured out this is Spike. You know the story so don't be askin' him or Buffy or Dawn, Willow, Kennedy or Giles about it. If you have and valid questions ask me. But not now. Right now you can all go to the dorms and chill out. I want all of you to hang out there tonight. Get out the extra beds for those who don't normally stay there and figure out sleeping arrangements. I really don't need to say this but if you're still a minor, boys in the basement girls in the upstairs. If you're over eighteen… well I'm only twenty-four so I know what happens, I just don't wanna see it or hear about it when I come over there later tonight to check on you guys. Now scram."

Spike was surprised at the tone of authority in Xanders voice. He was even more so when the students started to listen.

"How old are the midgets?" Spike asked.

"Our oldest are the watchers obviously; they're about 17-20 in age. The slayers are all 15-17. We try to pair them up in a two year age difference. " Xander looked at the retreating backs proudly. They had come a long way in two years. "C'mon I'll get you the blood."

They sat down at the table, Spike with his blood, while Xander grabbed himself a brandy. They drank in silence neither wanting to start the conversation.

"Why'd you do it Spike?" Xander finally asked, driving home to the heart of the issue.

"What are you talking about exactly?" Spike asked, playing dumb so he could think a bit more.

"Why didn't you let Buffy know? Or Dawn for that matter."

Spike started into his blood. "I couldn't mate. I, William the bloody Bloody, couldn't pick up a bleeding phone to call her. Either of them. I thought it would be better if I didn't. You know what went down in LA?"

"Yeah, Angel told us."

"Well Peaches always was for the sharing. After that, I headed out here. Got all the way to London even. Couldn't do it. Couldn't come here after all that time and say 'ello luv, Big Bad is back."

"Wait you still have a…" Xander asked looking nervous

"Yeah," Spike said bitterly, "still got that sodding soul." He looked back into his cup of blood. "Glad to see Peaches left some."

Xander looked at the vampire confused for a moment before he figured Spike meant the blood. "Spike," he said, "Angel was never here."

Spike took that in for a moment. "So what's with the on-hands blood bank?"

Xander sighed knowing he had to be honest, "Spike, when I said you had no idea what your sacrifice did to Buffy I meant it. We went to Rome for a bit after Sunnydale. Got Faith and Robin set up in Cleveland and then headed to Europe, looking for any surviving watchers. I'd never seen Buffy like that. She was all work girl. Only talked to Dawn some days. Most days she just answered direct questions about the job at hand. She was on auto pilot."

Spike flinched at the mental picture Xander painted for him. He saw that Buffy had lost weight in the past two years, cheek bones more prominent than ever before, he didn't want to think about what she looked like then.

"We settled here about six months after Sunnydale," Xander continued, "started getting slayers to train. And Buffy started getting better. She had a purpose again. It took her mind off things. She even went out on a date or two."

Something in Spike reared an angry head at the thought of Buffy with another man. He pushed that feeling down. She wasn't his anymore. She never was his when they were sleeping together, barely his the nights she let him hold her.

"It never went to a second date," Xander said seeing Spikes inner battle, "but she was starting to live again. Than Angel called. I've never seen her like that. It was worse than when she had to kill Angel. Something just broke. Hearing that you had been back for so long and never bothered to tell her. It killed her a bit. That's when she started keeping blood on hand. She hoped you were coming here. She never said it but you could tell if you knew her. Dawn to. They practically lived by the phone that first week. Than the weeks kept passing. You never came. Slowly they both lost hope. It was like you dying again all over. But they still kept the blood. Hoping against hope that you'd come back"

Spike didn't know what to do. He never wanted to hurt the slayer, or the little bit. He tightened his grip around his cup of blood so tight it caused the cup to shatter and blood to fly all over the table. Xander understood what he was feeling. He felt much the same when he left Anya at the altar. After cleaning up the spilt mess he handed Spike a piece of paper with an address written on it.

"This is my flat. You can stay there as long as you need."

"Thanks mate."

"Oh and Spike, for whatever reason you came back, I think it'll help Buffy, and Dawn. As much as I hate to admit it your part of this group now. In a way Angel never was."

Xander turned and left the cafeteria, leaving Spike alone to his thoughts.