BANE

25

It's very early in the morning. Everything is quiet and the nurses are careful to not make any loud sounds while maintaining their fast pace. Soo Ah stood out like a sore thumb in that quiet morning frenzy.

Having been a week here, she likes this atmosphere. It has just the perfect balance between tranquility and human movements. Not too quiet that it's deafening, or too fast & too much movement that it's overwhelming.

"Good morning, Nurse Kang." She greeted Nurse Kang that just came out of the nurses' common room.

"Aigooo... you're very early again today" Nurse Kang matched Soo Ah's happy mood. She has forgiven Soo Ah after that critical episode a week ago. If Geun Won is happy with her presence, shouldn't they all be supportive and help them with whatever little help they can give?

"Ne..."Soo Ah smiles brightly before she enters Geun Won's room.

The room is still dark, as Geun Won asked her to close the curtain yesterday and he is still fast asleep. It has started raining when he drifted off to sleep. She hadn't thought about it much.

Slowly, she opens the curtain to let the morning sun basks the room with it's warm light.

Geun Won is still fast asleep. She smiles. How he looks so at peace when he's asleep. The even rising and falling of his chest sends a sense of calmness to Soo Ah, it signifies that he is still alive. It makes her feel safe. Honestly, she doesn't realize when this funny feelings emerge. Maybe she was too scared when he almost not wake up from his slumber last week.

Soo Ah felt weird. How on earth, a Jang Geun Won being alive could make her feel like that? She almost laughed at it.

"Geun Won ah~" she taps carefully on Geun Won's shoulder and his eyes fluttered open. He is not a heavy sleeper himself.

The first thing he sees when he wakes up is,  the morning view outside. He knows Soo Ah is right next to him.

"Morning, Soo Ah" as he smiles brightly.

"You look particularly happy today. Good dream last night?" Soo Ah asked curiously. Admittedly, it is so awkward to ask about his dream like that, considering their history. But, who cares anyway? Things had been too crazy for her to care.

He laughed. He has gotten that Soo Ah back. The witty, unrestrained Soo Ah. The Soo Ah that very little people know about and even less of them appreciate.

"What answer do you want? Yes, or no?" That's how he always start their banter, even from school days. To answer with question, a thing that annoyed Soo Ah so much.

Rolling her eyes, she said "how do I know, silly?" And proceeded to push the button to lift the bed.

"Ne~Sajangnim. I had a good night sleep last night. No dream is a good dream"

"Oh? How so?" She asked this without thinking much.

But, when she looked at the hesitant smile on Geun Won's face, she became more curious.

Geun Won carefully reached her hand and motioned her to sit closer. She doesn't reproach his touch. Another new thing she found weird herself. His warm touch did not make her feel disgusted anymore. Now, she even feels comforted. He is still alive. That's all that matters to her now. It's like, all of those negative feelings dissolved altogether since last week.

He looks at her beautiful curious eyes.

"Every day, I am haunted by my past. It never leaves me. Not a day. But, it is not nearly as torturing when I'm haunted by the 'what if'. Thanks to you, I know how much of a jerk I was....no. I'm still a big jerk."

Soo Ah wants to interrupt at that but she could feel his hand assured her not to and let him finish.

"There's a lot of things that I could have done differently, but I didn't. I chose the wrong paths again and again. Hurting too many people in the process. All because I was a bitter jackass. I was an idiot. I was immature" Geun Won shuts his eyes. A lone tear runs down his cheek.

"It's okay. It's all in the past now. Everyone has moved on. Geun Won ah..."she wiped his tears with her thumbs and cupped his left cheek with her hands firmly.

"..so you should too. Everyone is living happily now. You deserve it too."

"Are you happy, Soo Ah?"

"..." Soo Ah is left speechless. She is quite shocked. Is she that significant to Geun Won?

Gaining her composure, she replied " I wasn't. But now, I feel better. Safer. Maybe because I know you're here"

She tried to convey her gratitude with that word.  It's forever insufficient as compared to what he had done to protect her. But, she will try to express it with every chance she got.

"Anddd...you should't forget your promise to show me around today." Soo Ah changed the tone suddenly. She refused to let today be in a sad mood after such great start. It's good that he lets his feelings out but he needs to enjoy his time too.

Geun Won chuckles with her silly antiques. Is this God's grace to him? Whatever power out there that give him this bliss, he is thankful. His life had been harsh. But at least his death is not going to be that merciless.