憂鬱| Melancholy

一

     Phonophobia: fear of loud noises.

    “Eleena, hurry up!! we're running late.” Shoutes Minette as she looks at me through my window. She's huffing, it's our first day. Usually students are excited about the first day of school each new year. But it took me everything to get up today. I'm not ready to face another year of stress, I kind of only want to stay in bed till I fall asleep.

    I quickly put my shoes on, tie my hair in a loose ponytail and grab my back bag. I rush to the door and search for Minette. She's still standing in the same spot, gesturing with her right hand for me to be faster.

    “I'm coming!” I yell, I make my way to catch up with her. She's running. She reminds me a lot of my mom. I don't mind that, I consider her a part of my family anyway.

    She looks back at me to check if I'm following her just as fast. I'm not, I'm walking, I'm not trying to be rude, but I don't have the enough energy to run. I'm not really a morning person, I stayed up late. She pauses. As I finally reach her, she smiles the softest smile I've ever seen her draw on her face. It makes me smile, too.

    “I'm so happy to see you today, Eleena.” I can see gratitude in her chocolate brown eyes. I take few seconds to remind myself of what an amazing bestfriend I've got.

    “You’re the only one who makes school bearable, Minette.” I grin. She keeps smiling.

    “It's our first day in the new year, I can't wait to meet everyone, I wonder it anyone got a huge glow up that I wouldn't recognize them.”

    “I wonder about that too.” I stretch my arms as I'm walking. I yawn and wish I stayed in bed.

    The refreshing breeze at the early morning, the birds singing together and the perspicuous air going in through my lungs. I feel so relaxed, I could fall asleep any moment.

   While I'm enjoying the smell of air at the early morning, I notice a man sleeping on the grass nearby the street. It shatters my heart into small pieces in which no one can gather. I wonder if he ever had a family, if he ended up that way because his parents didn't want him, how he survives every single day, if his biggest dream is to have somewhere warm to stay and if he ever thought of himself as cursed for not having the simple necessaries to sleep without worrying about how he's going to survive the next day. All these thoughts take the passion I have to continue the rest of the day. It's sad to know that there are millions of people who can never experience the simple joys of life that most of us take for granted.

    My day hasn't even started, yet it's ruined. Not that it wasn't going to be ruined either way. I know that the moment I walk into my house, the moment I think about it, like right now, it will ruin all my days.

    Minette acknowledges the melancholic look on my face, “I know,” her voice tone is low. Referring to the homeless man, the same thoughts flashed through her head.

    We finally reach our school, I'm looking at the namelist to check which class I'm in.

    I usually am in the same class as Minette every year, but this year I'm not. “Looks like we're not in the same class, Eleena.” Minette says, frustrated.

    I sigh, this isn't how I want to start my new school year. It's not that I'm not a social person. in fact, I'm good at communicating with my surroundings. I want to be with Minette in the same class because it's hard to understand others’ true intentions, one might see it as dramatic. Throughout all the movies I have watched and the books I have read, high school students always pull out some stunt. It's not logical to believe what I see in either movies or books but the fact most people find high school that way is definitely something and I don't want to accidentally get myself into something I'm incapable of handling. I'm just being careful.