The Coffee. DATE?

the story

It was time, the date has arrived. And Dan Gansley was sweating bullets. He was waiting for Haboo's great arrival into the Cafesteraunt. And out of nowhere, he arrived. His shadowy self arrived out from the crack under beneath the the table.
  "Helloœ my lœüve. If it isnt the finest Gan Man in all of the worldiverse." Haboo slithered his words.
  "Nobody has every called me by Gan Man except for when they love me, which is none of the time." He blushed loudly. "This takes me back to the old McDovey lovey contest in 83, yes indeedy. I lost that competition because the only true love I felt was the warm embrace of nobody else but my own."
"Ah yeßß," Haboo said. "But nœw that we are official you can now win the contest. I shall name a snæiek hole in your honor."
Gansley gasped. "Nobody had ever named anything after me except for that time back in Boston when a handsome young good looking fellow with a strange libido for exotic hamsters from Bermuda named his pet bat after a batman pun."
Dan cleared his throat "Danananagananana batman."
Haboo slithered instead of laughing which is the only way that he can ever laugh.
  Then a man broke into out from a wall. "HELLO. It is I! indus. youre waiter." He pulled out two menus from god who knows where. "How may I start you off? Drinks? Appeteizers? Some Barriers?"
"Hmmm yæisss. Some barriers for me and my.. partñęr." Haboo suggested. "And two wines," The Ganinator added.
"OK! coming right up! And I will make the barriers using my epithet, which is barrier."  Indus forms pulls out some barriers and gives it to the lovely couple.
"How many?" Indus insquired?
"Make it sicks." Said Gannananana-batman.
"YES BATMAN!" he gives them 3 each, then goes off to fetch the drinks.
"How divine this dæte is going," Haboo said, absorbing one of his barriers.
"Yes I do so agree," Gansley said as he bit a chunk out of the barrier.
"Divine indeed. I know exactly a man who would pay very finely for this nice table set. His epithet is fortniteture."
Haboo blinked blaringly, "Hmmm... yæis.. This wood is a fine umber pigment with an undertone of orange. It smells of the brazillian amazon, of the northwest." He sniffs the table. "I sense and wiff that this trëê was cut in the front facing direction with an axe in half."
"I like my men how I like my panthers. Able to sense the direction that trees were cut in," Dan complimented Habob.
"I'm back" screamed indus loudly.
Indus plased down the fine wine. But they looked closer and it was acrually a Drinkier! And what was this? A wine glassier. They are wine and glass, but made out of barrier. 
"Wow are these liquid barriers?" Dan gansley asked the tall indus.
"Yes! I melted them at precisely 490°C." he talked. "Lady mera told me that melting things at 490 degrees celcus was tequnique for 'destroying the evidance.'"
"A fine tequnique if I do say so myself," Dan gansley went on. "I remember doing this in the great barrier contest of 90. You shouldve seen WallMcGee. He was a natural at the sport. Exellent barrier handler."
"Wow! I cannot believe it! Wait until I tell lady mera!" He dashed out the barrier door, onto barrier avenue, then to barrier boulevard, to Barrierstan he went.
"Yês go on.. Me and Gandidate need some alœne time." Said the haboo.
Then, Gansley felt a pounding in his heart for a second. He was blushing FORTISSIMO. He looked at Haboo with such lust. "Haboo you are my true love. You are the bonnie to my clyde. My ride or die."  Dan confessed.
Haboo blushed too. "As a wãtcher of a galaxyvêrśe, I promised myself not to fall in love with a creature that has a life span that is 0.3% mine. But I will give in this œnce."