Childhood 2.0

The Statue

There are a few things that are certain in life. One of them is taxation and another one is death. I noticed as well, that the older you got, the more you had to visit the doctor or have tests at the hospital. Here I was once again getting test after test and thinking that my body is slowly giving up. The doctor tells me that my blood pressure is too high, I need to lose weight and I need to exercise more. Besides all this, I had to smoke less and eat more healthy. What can I do except nod and agree with what he says? It all makes sense, and I am determined to follow his advice!

I went home with more medicine to add to my daily intake. It seems as if every time I have seen a doctor, I was given more medicine! I knew that I could live a better lifestyle. I just needed willpower. I was also proud of myself that I did not smoke since the doctors. I know this was just a few hours, but for me, this was a miracle. It was only when I have seen the news, that I smoked a cigarette. Who would blame me? The war in Ukraine has threatened world peace. Inflation is going up and up. There was no good news whatsoever. The world was a mess and run by idiots. At times, smoking a cigarette seemed like it should be the least of my concerns.

Do not think that I am a grumpy man. I was a happy man. I had a job that I liked. I had a good marriage while it lasted. I had two children that I was proud of. It was good that I was not poor or rich. I had a comfortable life. This was an achievement in a world where so many people did not have basic needs. I had nothing to complain about.

Despite that I knew I should not complain, I had some problems. I worried a lot. What would happen If I lost my job? I was getting old now and it was hard for middle-aged men to get jobs. As a divorced man, I also wondered if I would ever find love again. The thing that hurt the most was that I missed my children. They were now adults and had their own lives to lead. I could understand that they did not have lots of time and they did fit me in their schedule when they could or had a bad conscience. Still, I missed them.

The big question I asked myself over and over was what did life have to offer now? Was it now just a waiting game until I would die and be a forgotten part of history? I felt as if I achieved all that I could. This meant that life now was a Status Quo. There seemed to be little hope about the future, as there was not much of a future left. As I said, I considered myself a happy person, but it was a constant fight not to let fear and depression become a problem.

I visited the local Church. This church had been part of my life since I was a child. It is hard to say how religious I was, but the church always gave me peace and comfort. It was the reason why I was at the church today. Maybe the place would give me hope and bring more happiness to my life. Just maybe it will give me a purpose.

As I sat in the church, my mind went back to my childhood. Everything was so easier back then. I was not worried about anything and life was about having fun. My childhood was a carefree place where everything was a fun adventure. It was a stress-free time. I walked to a statue in the church and asked God for help. I wanted to smile once again when I woke up. I did not want a life where I was just waiting for death. Imagine what life would be like as a child.

As I touched the statue, there was suddenly a fog around the statue. The whole church quickly filled with fog. I could not see anything except the statue. It became so much that I could not breathe. As I tried to breathe, I collapsed to the floor. I tried everything that I could. I could not even yell with pain. It felt as if my lungs were collapsing. I closed my eyes thinking If I was to die, then inside a church would be the best place to do it.

I no longer felt pain or suffering. I slowly could feel myself leaving my body. Everything went black.

" Time to get up!"

That was my mother shouting. I was still alive! For some reason, I was in my old bedroom. This confused me but the only thing I could think about was that my mom has been taking care of me since what had happened at the church. I just sat on my bed and looked around. It was as if I was in a museum. There were posters of Madonna, Wham and Prince on my walls. The toys I had were still there. I could even see my old school bag! It was like being in a museum in the 1980s. All I could do is look around and remember how happy I was as a child. It was nice being at home. I could stay here a few days and let my mother feed me up and spoil me.