When the World Turns Upside Down

I Love You So

Polite Spy sighs, sitting on the workbench in the RED supply room like he always does. Painis let him come take a rest inside of here while chaos continued to ensure outside the room.

'Alone again,' he thought. He cups his hands together, his shoes gently tapping on the white, marble floor. That was, until he heard continuous distant shotgun cocking noises. They grew louder to the room, until the doors open to reveal a bloody looking Soldier, staining his red coat and dripping down from his mouth. His helmet casted a terrifying looking shadow over his face, but his blue eyes beamed through the shadow. He grinned widely, his deformed body rises before the BLU spy in the yellow hat.

"YOU WERE RIGHT! THE RED SNIPER DID HAVE A TASTIER FLAVOR TO HIM!" he pants in his face, in which the spy quickly returns his usual grin and chuckles. His arm reaches behind him to grab a stained cloth to wipe the blood off of Painis' face.
"HE WAS MUCH EASIER TO ACCESS THAN THE PYRO."

The cloth becomes reddish from the fresh blood on this monster.
"That's great! You seem so happy and satisfied," chirped the much cleaner looking freak. After wiping Painis' face, he looks at his chest, and then his hands. Nearly coated in blood... Surely he went more for seconds. Probably thirds. He wouldn't know, he is always out hanging out with his buddies, he thought to himself.
Of course, that's not the case. This cannibal is always getting into trouble, whether that being beating the hell out of a Vagineer, or leaving a blood trail in Heavydile's swamp pond. Painis nods to Polite's response.

"Go back out there and knock 'em, you're doing such a wonderful job!"

"NO NO... I WANT TO STAY WITH YOU RIGHT NOW."

The spy raises an eyebrow, but he kept that grin of his. He gave him a single nod, and folds the cloth. He puts it back on the shelf behind him.
"Of course! You've been out all day. You need to take a break at some point." He gently tells him, his arms open for him.

Painis then fell onto his knees, resting his head on his thigh. His big, bloodied arms wrap around his waist, purring softly as he felt soft and delicate hands touch his back. His eyes slightly close, while he hears the French accent quiet down. His surroundings start to mute itself as he hears one of his favorite things,, Stories that Polite Spy never failed to amuse him with... Even if he barely even listened to any of them. He quietly growled and rubbed his cheek on his thigh, until his eyes fully close. Something about Polite made him calm...

... The sweet gentleman then,, frowned. He sighs, looking down at the relaxed soldier. He stopped talking, and brought his attention up to the ceiling. A change of emotion overrides him. As he continued to rub Painis, he felt this strange sensation run through him.
'Why... Why does he want to stay with me? Why does he even care about me? He's a monstrous cannibal, he should have ate me whole just like all the others. Sparing a limb is getting tiring.'

Though, his thoughts were interrupted by loud screams of fear and a familiar song playing in the distance.
The Millionare's Holidaaaay, the song sang. Oh... Typical Brutal Sniper. Sounds like he's having fun out there... Maybe too much fun. Then, his hysterical laughter was heard.

His attention was drawn to the doors opening, grinning again, the doors also revealing a bloodied freak, along with his fedora wearing companion. He didn't look too happy... That was probably because of the blood that splattered on his white dress shirt and his red vest.
Sniper looks at Polite and Painis, an evil grin wiped on his face. He was wielding his trusty Tribalman's Shiv, covered to the brim in blood that dripped down from the sharp tip.

"Oi, Spy! Whaddya doin' makin' that Soldier suck yer cock?" He laughed, which makes Gentlespy roll his eyes and place his fingers on his forehead. Though it makes Polite shake his head.
"Oh, no! Painis is just taking a small rest. He's been hunting for more then half of the day," calmly he told him.

"Did he make ye cum already? Aww, I missed out on the show."

Painis growls and raises his head, turning his head over his shoulder, seeing the brutal murderer making these inappropriate jokes. His face makes a scowl,, He despised this man. But he wanted to keep calm when Polite was around.
"I JUST GOT IN HERE..."

"Say, why do you allow a BLU spy in the RED base in the first place?" Gentlespy groans.

"MY TERRITORY. I COULD EAT EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU AND LEAVE YOUR BONES SCATTERED OUT THIS DOOR RIGHT ABOUT NOW."

"No need to get aggressive, my good friends," Polite Spy looks around the room and raises his eyebrows with glee. Sniper only smirked and rolled his eyes. He wasn't too intimated by this wretched cannibal, mostly because he's really cocky and egotistical. He and Painis fought a lot.. Though their fights mostly ended up in ties.

"'Ere, lemme handle this animal for ya." CBS bends down slightly and pats his knees, gesturing him to come over to him. He smirks and makes kissy sounds to alert him, as if he was an actual dog.
"C'mere, doggy. Come to Sniper."

It only upset Painis more, though,, He tries to leave Polite's arms, but he was only drawn in closer. A nervous chuckle escapes from his mouth.
"Hey, hey,, You all look splendid today, and I think we should keep this room a little clean, shouldn't we?"

"Spy's right. Ya hear that, doggy?"

Another loud growl. This man is seriously getting on his nerves. If he says one more thing...

"Look all, I have another fantastic story to share. This one I made up in ten minutes; How I Met His Mother."

Sniper hummed a laugh in his throat and decided to go sit at the workbench across from Painis and Polite. He gestures Gentie to come sit next to him, which he hesitates. He shook his head and before CBS could threaten him, he cloaks himself and runs out of the base.

CBS did not enjoy listening to Polite Spy's boring, long stories. Usually he was dragged in to listen to some of them. Though, there are those occasional times where he listens into one about murder, obviously... He may or may not be obsessive over that topic. And since his humor was like an immature twelve year old's, he'd laugh by hearing the word "sex". Which occasionally he heard in the stories and would start giggling.

Normally another guest would show up to listen to these stories, and somehow enjoyed them or showed some kind of interest.
"Has anyone seen Vagineer? He's going to miss out on this great adventure."

"Who cares? Get on with it already, his fault he's late." CBS rolled his eyes, placing his weapon down on the bench. He leans his body forward, placing his bloody fingers on his knees. The blood gets his black pants a little dirty.
"LEAVE HIM OUT OF IT." Painis growled. The Vagineer was one of his worst enemies,, Countless fights with him, Freddy VS. Jason style.

"Maybe he can join in during the story! So, let us begin now, shall we?"

"I approached his mother with my gentle touch on her waist..."