COME ALIVE

two

     He avoided his parents for about two months before they showed up in front of his apartment, looking somehow sad. He didn't expect to see them. The boy thought that maybe his mother would call him and he would yell at him on the phone, asking him why he hadn't given a sign of life for two months. Honestly, Jungguk didn't want to know about them. Yeah, he loved his parents, but the whole "you need to be the best" talk didn't help him study.

     All the stress accumulated during these two months seemed to multiply when he saw his mother in front of the door, his facial expression being one that he recognized out of a thousand. Disappointment. 

     He was a disappointment to them.

     "Love, look at you, you lost so much weight. I knew you studied so much, but please eat something in your free time." said his mother, taking his cheeks between her fingers.

     He wanted to laugh in her face. What free time? He didn't have any. And why is that? Because of them, because of they're manipulating him into studying law and making a better future for himself.

     This wasn't the truth. He knew the truth. Their image and social status will increase because he is a lawyer. And the money will probably be controlled by them, because "their little boy could not spend so much money". They didn't want what was best for Jungguk, they wanted what was best for them and their family status. They wanted to be respected in a special way.

     "Mom... please. I told you already. I'm trying, but-"

     It was useless. It was simply impossible to explain why he hated what he was doing, that his mental state was serious, and his emotional state was down to earth. So he kept quiet, listening to his parents talking about how the son of a neighbor who had just moved in front of them was a well-known doctor who was studying a method to beat cancer.

—-

     "So I'm guessing it didn't go well?"

     After his parents decided that the gossip session was ready, and after making sure that their boy was well fed to start a new learning session, they left, leaving Jungguk behind with a huge pain of that. After the boy recovered, he decided that the best solution was to talk to someone about it, and his trusted friend, Soobin, was there for him. So they went to one of the nearby caffees. 

     "It was horrible, Soobin. They kept talking about how I should not ruin my future, and if I do, they would disinherit me and never talk to me again. I couldn't tell them the truth, Bin. I do not know what to do. I feel like I'm going crazy with them and all the stress of college. I can't even give up, you know? It's my last year ... My parents spent so much money to keep me in college, and now ..." tears started to appear on Jungguk face, his eyes now red and fluffy.

    "Hyung-... I don't know what to say."

     They sat quietly for a few minutes, the waiter coming and taking their orders. They looked at each other, and Jungguk stopped the tears from running down with the sleeve of his blouse. He knew that Soobin was not in his situation and would never fully understand him, and he was jealous of that. He was jealous because he wanted his parents to be like the boy's parents. He wanted someone to be with him and support his dreams, not someone who shattered them. He was exhausted. Physically and mentally. The only solution he had was to continue as he was, listening to his parents and becoming a successful lawyer. A lawyer who hated his job, a lawyer who wasn't mentally stable because of his parents ... a lawyer who had another dream.

     No one spoke until the waiter came back with orders, apologizing when he saw that there was a tense situation between the two boys.

     "I think... you should quit." said the younger one, looking at his coffee that sit right in front of him.

     "How?" asked Jungguk, his voice unsure and scared. "My parents are crazy, Soobin. They... "

     "You could start fresh. You could be staying at my place for a few months... and then, then sign up to another university. And I know you, Jungguk, you are like, really smart. You could easily get a scholarship and just... Be happy, hyung."

     "It's not that easy... Thank you, Soobin. For everything." And with that the boy came out of the cafe, leaving Soobin's money on the table to pay, his coffee untouched.

     He left. Of course, he had to go to his special place to relax, where he spent most of his time anyway. The only place he could breathe properly, and the one where he could be himself.

     When he reached the ice skating rink he could say that he was relaxed, but not completely. He put on his skates quickly, as if impatient, slipping on the freshly polished ice. His legs seemed to be on fire, ready to skate on their own unless Jungguk hurried.

     That was his method of relaxation, physical exhaustion. Everything seemed simple, he went there, trained, tried some new moves until he calmed down, and then went to his apartment, and the next morning he was going to call his parents and apologize for the outburst he had. However, it did not happen as he expected. Making some fairly advanced jumps on the ice already cut by the slats of the skates of the people who had been there before, the boy began to remember the book that Soobin had recommended to him.

"Not now..." he sighed. He didn't want to think negatively at that moment. He was too tired for that.

     But his mind was already there, putting himself in Jungkook's place. He wondered what would have happened if he had been in the boy's place? He had thought that he had a much harder life than Jungkook's, especially since the boy was in a coma until he died in the book, a bad decision the author had made, Jungguk had thought. He dreamed of having parents like the boy in the book. His dream was to be able to continue his hobby, and not worry about all the exams he was going to take next week. He wanted to be free, to do what he wanted, when he wanted, without anyone blowing in the back of his head and criticizing every move he made.

     The poor boy was fed up with the behavior of his parents, who were horrible enough to see that their son was actually being destroyed, just for their sake. So with one last jump, and with a moment's confidence, the boy decided to just do what his heart desired.

     He spun a few times and then he threw himself into the air, ready to roll his head to make the jump when his ski blade clung to an ice hole that was in the ring. He unbalanced and landed to one side, thus hitting his head and cutting his hand with the blade of his ski shoes.

     His gaze darkened, his whole body aching, and he was sure he had broken something important. His hand had already begun to bleed profusely, and the boy began to see black in front of his eyes, fainting, hoping that someone would find him there in time.