I had a difficult time sleeping that night and woke up early rather than hazily remain twisted up in my blankets. My mind was dwelling on an amalgam of issues, most notably my work project and my little tea date with Chuu. After sleeping on the issue, I felt as though I had somewhat stepped around the line of professionalism by going out with her. While our time spent together was innocent enough, I couldn't help but think about making a go at her. There was something quite endearing to me about her geekiness. It was a world I had no experience with, outside my purview, and something that, admittedly, excited me greatly. I wanted to know more about her.
I looked around my bedroom, with its modern design and large window wall, happy that I had been able to build such a life for myself and saddened that I didn't have someone next to me in bed to share it with. Maybe that person was Chuu. I didn't know. But I so desperately wanted to find out.
With my hair back in a ponytail, wearing a white tank top and loose grey sweatpants, I gripped my phone and wandered into my kitchen. Coffee was already made thanks to my preprogrammed coffeemaker — hey, I'm not totally tech illiterate — so I grabbed a cup and sat down at my kitchen island. I gazed into my phone and considered texting Chuu, despite how early in the morning it was. I mean, a text at 7 AM wasn't crazy on Saturday morning, was it?
With that morning jolt of caffeine from my coffee, I worked up the courage to begin composing a text. I didn't really know what I could say but I just wanted to reach out, I just wanted a bit of a connection. I tried not to expect much of anything, I only felt like I needed to make a move.
"Thanks for the tea date last night," I began typing into my phone. "You're free, maybe I could take you somewhere today?"
I stared down at my phone at this message in the composition window, feeling a bit scared to send it. Why was I scared? Why was I so nervous about this? It's not like I totally embarrassed myself the previous night. Got along great. I couldn't help but feel a little strange about our business relationship, but it wasn't like she was assigned to work at my company every day like some of her coworkers. I could navigate this. I was a professional success. Relationships didn't have to be so hard.
My finger dangled over the "send" button for a moment or two before I closed my eyes and finally touched the button. I took a deep breath, set my phone on the counter, and watched the window to see if she'd text back.
I tried to imagine what'd I'd tell Chuu I had in mind. Maybe we could go to the Natural History Museum or go take a cold walk along the lake. I guess the cold lake walk wasn't too enticing of a scenario, but I did enjoy seeing the lake in winter, snow all around the beach, frigid waves crashing up onto the shore.
Maybe we could go ice skating in Millennium Park? I mean, it sounds fun but it was a bit of a corny idea for a date. Very romantic comedy. I had a feeling that Chuu might roll her eyes at the suggestion. I don't know why I thought that. Probably just projecting my own insecurities.
After I finished my cup of coffee and Chuu still hadn't texted back, I felt a little distraught. Standing up from the stool at my kitchen island, I placed my empty cup in the sink and stretched out. Having no plans for the day, I figured I should just go hop into the shower, get dressed, and head into the office. I could probably get a lot done with the quiet of a Saturday, as only a handful of the foreign market traders would be at work. I wouldn't have to totally dress up, I could be comfortable and casual. And then maybe I could lighten my load for Monday.
Just as I made my move to leave my kitchen and head toward the shower, my phone buzzed on the counter and I almost tripped on my own feet as I leaped toward it excitedly. How quickly our focus can change. I eagerly held the phone in both hands, unlocked it, and looked into the text window to gobble up Chuu's response
"Yeah!" was her response with a little yellow emoji smiling next to her text. "Still in bed, but totally down to hang later. What did you have in mind?"
I hadn't really settled on a date idea, so my brain began to race at a mile a minute. We could do brunch, I thought, and then off to something else. But what could that be? I wanted to make a good impression like I was cool like I had my act together like I wasn't some lonely workaholic. I mean, I was a lonely workaholic but I didn't have to act like one when trying to impress somebody. I just couldn't get my mind straight or flesh out an idea.
After a moment, I just started typing to see what would come out.
"How about brunch?" I wrote, sending it in its own message first. I then furiously typed my next line into the phone with my thumbs. "Then maybe we could go ice skating downtown."
I felt my stomach drop after hitting send. I felt so unbelievably corny for suggesting ice skating. It could be fun, of course, but I felt like it made me seem old or something. Chuu probably just wanted to camp out in her apartment with a blanket wrapped around her playing a computer game.
"Wow!" she typed back. "I would never think to do that. I'm in!"
My jaw dropped when I read her text. Chuu was actually enthusiastic about my silly plan. But I was elated and relieved. I just hoped I remembered how to skate.
"I'll pick you up at 11," I wrote. "Text me your address."
It had been so long since I'd been on a Saturday day date, that it didn't seem like this was my reality. But Chuu had me feeling giddy again, giddy in a way that I hadn't felt in a long time. Since I'd cleaned up my act, gotten serious about work, love had become a difficult thing for me to wrangle. I wanted to really try to make things work with Chuu if she'd have me of course, and I was eager to impress. But how does someone like me impress a geek girl?
