when I am around him my whole world stop's it like I am in space and he is the stars and the moon. when I am around him it is like nothing else matters, I know he won't even like me the way I like him. but I can dream of it, he is perfect from his blonde fluffy hair to the way he will try to dumb shit down for me. so I can understand even though I know what we are talking about.
I like just to hear him talk to me like a real human, I could get lost in his blue eyes and in his lips. Well in my head I can. I'm too short for him and not to mention wait but I would lose all of it just for him to like me, Or hell if he didn't like me being trans I would stay a girl for him. my friend hit his hand it is was red and he let me hold them both to look at them, my heart was beating so fast the whole time.
I feel like I could pass out at that very moment like I was flying in the air. I don't know what he felt but I could die and be happy at that very moment.
I know he doesn't want to date anyone while he is in school. he says that it takes too much effort into dating someone by calling them and texting them and how he has better things he could be doing with his time than texting someone, but I wanted to care he is my whole world at the moment. so it scares me to see him run to her. . .
I know she will use him. hell, she has most of the guys in our class. she gets them wrapped around her finger and she won't let go of them till she has used them dry, I can't lose him to her I have shit exes who have left me for someone else or have me be their other woman. and I don't want that to happen again, but it will.
so, for now, I will enjoy his company and his talks and the way he smells and the way he talks to me like being a real human being so I can hold onto the little bit of light that he gives me in this dark dark room of mine. . . .
