A Barkeep And His Poet

I Could Definitely Like Him

I can't sleep.

Sleeping means the morning will come and I have to make a decision about Venti.

I don't want to hurt his feelings, at the same time I don't want to say no. But I don't know why I would say yes.

I don't love him. But I could definitely like him.

I'm confused by what he wants. Liking someone doesn't mean dating. Kaeya and Albedo aren't dating. Neither are Lisa and Jean. At least not as far as I'm aware.

Do I want to date Venti? I don't not want to date him.

Do I like him like that?

I spend the whole night twisting and turning in bed. Nowhere close to sleep.

Dusk quickly approaches, signaling the new day. The day where I have to talk to him.

I could always leave it alone. He was drunk, he might not have meant it. Or he did mean it and he might not remember.

What the fuck am I supposed to do? What should I think?

Getting up and dressed, I head to Mondstadt.

When I get there, the tavern is quiet.

"Venti?" I call. Heading to the room upstairs two steps at a time, I see that the bed is made and he's gone. "Venti?"

The air feels stale like he hasn't been here in a while. Like no one's been here. It's only ten. It doesn't normally take that long to get to Mondstadt from the winery. But hilichurls were blocking the road.

Where could he have gone? He was so drunk, I can't imagine he would have gotten that far.

I stay in the tavern until dark. He's an alcoholic, he can't stay away for long. But he doesn't come. Kaeya comes and insures me that my rumor problem is solved, but I could have told anyone that. After seeing how bruised and afraid Charles looked, I doubt he would tell another lie. No matter how small.

Venti doesn't come. No beautiful singing and no mystical strum of his lyre. Damn it, I might like him more than I've let myself believe.

Rosaria catches me slipping on patrol. A slime catches me by surprise for me milliseconds before I burn it to ashes.

I do the same the second night. He doesn't come into my tavern. Angel's Share is dull without him, and I don't feel my face flush with any of the other customers. My vision doesn't warm me without him around. I'm starting to doubt that it's my vision at all.

The wind in Mondstadt is weak, nothing more than a light breeze. It's eerie, the sheer lack of him around.

By the third night I losing my patience. He's never been away for this long before. He'll miss a night or two, but never three. I'll never admit it, even to myself, but I've had more than one set of eyes on him for a while.

For a split second, I think I catch a glimpse of gold hair and a green cape, but by the time I get around the corner, they're gone. I don't sleep that night.

On the fourth day, I set out to find Traveler. But exhaustion slows me down. Every time I see a strand of gold hair or a starry constellation pop in and out of the air, it's there and gone within the moment.

I sleep on the third floor of the tavern that night. No bartending, just restless sleep.

The morning of the fifth day, I'm done. This is getting out of hand. I can not go on like this. There is nothing I can do if he avoids me like this. I have to get back into things like they were.

But I can't stop thinking. Thinking about his hands, he has calluses on his fingertips from years of playing the lyre. Or his hair, it looks as smooth as my silk sheets. What would it be like to have him sleep in my bed? Nothing sexual, just holding him while he sleeps.

What if he wants something sexual? What would that be like? No, Diluc, no. You can't ask that of him. He said he likes you, not that he wants anything to do with you. He hasn't been by in days. There is no proof that he wants me. There is no way I can ask him.

But I have to ask. I can't let this consume me. Finding him is my top priority.

I go back to waiting for him in the tavern. He has to come back, he's an alcoholic. I wait all night. I don't see or hear anything, until Kaeya comes in.

He struts in after closing with Albedo. "I'll have a Death After Noon, and my good friend will have..." he looks to Albedo.

"Grape juice." Ah, a man with good taste.

"Boring, he'll have what I'm having." He smirks, though he keeps his distance from Albedo.

"Taverns closed, what do you want?" He smiles at me, but it's condescending.

"What do I want? Am I not allowed to go to my favorite tavern with a good friend of mine. What are you, homophobic? Besides, the more important question is 'why is YOUR bard at Cats Tail'?"

And I laugh. A good hearty laugh. "McWhat? Say that again. Make sure I hear you right this time."

"Why? Is your bard? At Cats Tail?" He sounds unsure this time, pausing in between every few words. The air is hot, thick with frost and steam.

"That's what I thought you said." Grabbing my coat I head for the door.

"So are the drinks free?" I hear him call after me. Only for Albedo to tell him no.

"Don't lock up behind me," I call over my shoulder. I don't wait for an answer.

Walking to Cats Tail doesn't take long, mostly because I run. I don't think I've run that fast in my life.

When I get there Diona is spraying him with a spray bottle. Water I hope. "I'll take him for you, Diona," I say, panting.

"Hmph," She scoffs. "Should I even let you take him? He hasn't been to your tavern in DAYS." She crosses her arms. "What did you do?"

"I didn't do anything. I don't think I did anything. I just want to make sure he's OK and has a place to sleep tonight." I say honestly. She looks skeptical but gives in after a moment.

"Fine, but the next time he's at my tavern for anything but playing cards, I will scratch your eyes out." She looks like she means it, so I put my hands up in surrender.

"I promise." She almost looks like she wants to smile at me.

"Take him, sober him up too. I hate drunk people. And it would be a shame if anyone hated him." Her tail flicks back and forth as she talks, and her ears twitch.

I nod, picking Venti up. He clings to me again and my heart picks up speed. Warmth spreads through my chest and I don't think it's my vision anymore.

"Go burn your own tavern down, Master Diluc. I swear, pyro visions holders and their inability to emotion." She sighs.

I smile at her. Ok, maybe my vision has something to do with the heat around me, but not the warmth in my chest. That's all Venti.

Getting to the tavern I'm relieved that Kaeya and Albedo are both gone and the door isn't locked. A bottle of wine is missing but other than that the tavern is how I left it.

I'll leave it alone, information does come at a price after all.

Taking him up to the third floor, I tuck him into the bed. I stay for a moment, looking at him. Watching the rise and fall of his chest, the way his hair falls on the pillow, god I wish I could hold him. Feel his hair slip through my fingers.

Leaving into the rest of the small apartment I have upstairs, I start cleaning the already spotless living room.

I can't sleep, if I do I risk him leaving again.

We have a lot to talk about in the morning.