"Consequences be damned."
⎯ Satomi's Decision, five years ago.
She made peace with it. And chose not to regret it in moving forward. But she couldn't help but wonder; was that selfish decision ultimately what saved her?
"Wouldn't make it selfish h...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
TOKYO, JAPAN
Gojo hated righteousness.
His moral-complexity would not stand for the lack of reality in the righteousness one portrays through either their words or actions. He didn't like the lack of ones introspection in why something was right to do, considering all a righteous person does is tell you what they think is right and wrong, nothing more, nothing less. It was so damn tone-deaf—just another way of viewing the world as black and white. Yet those sanctimonious bastards never fail to let their true colors show when on the brink of death.
The issue was first brought up around Geto, a former comrade he once viewed as his equal despite their heavily contrasting views, only but a couple of years before things drastically changed. And even though they might not have always agreed, Satoru would've never lost respect for him because of it. That's how the world works—it wouldn't be as interesting if none of us disagreed on something. And it was fun to piss him off every now and then.
But the second time this topic came around in a way that struck his psyche was during an assignment as first years. This time, no engagement in discourse surrounding the subject of righteousness occurred, but rather, the internal conflict in one particular student.
〄
Furusato was different than Gojo and Geto. While the two acted as polar opposites, Furusato served as that middle ground. Not because she found neutrality in both sides of the spectrum, but because she herself didn't understand where she stood in the grey area between right and wrong. That was very evident in her hesitation when saving a group of innocent children at a curse-infested elementary school. It made no difference to Gojo whether if he was successful in retrieving the missing children or not as far as beating himself up over the mission goes, just as long as the cursed spirit had been exorcised. And Geto on the other hand; he was hellbent on securing the children.
That didn't mean Gojo didn't make an effort to save the children, however. He did in fact try. A lot harder than he should have, probably. But he made peace with the fact that in order to be a jujutsu sorcerer, he needed to remain focused on his main priority. Life is full of casualties, that's just the way it is. It was tragic, but he was no hero.
Furusato was raised with a similar mindset... in the aspect of completing her job, first and foremost. Howbeit her father did differ from Gojo by one crucial detail that separates them entirely from one another: objective.
While Gojo put forth the effort to protect the innocent lives of (annoyingly) fragile humans, her father scolded her for even considering such an outlandish goal. Becoming a jujutsu sorcerer, one that would eventually lead this clan to fortune and prosperity meant that Satomi needed to be selfish in every way possible. She had to disregard the lives of those around her—even her colleagues to excel in Jujutsu society. But her heart knew that such ideals derived from a corrupted soul. She then had to ask herself; What kind of Sorcerer did Satomi want to be? What kind of person did Satomi want to be?
These were questions Gojo hadn't given much thought to at the time. He was too wrapped up in other things to entertain them and he had yet to experience any sort of devastation that would challenge his immaturity. But when he saw it in Satomi, he knew he truly didn't understand a thing about her. Her turmoil went beyond anything he could've pictured—as a matter of fact, it made her sick by the end of it.
Gojo knew he didn't want to turn out like his elders, but that was about all he could say for his future. Something in the way Satomi looked in the children's eyes that night spoke a sonnet of a million and one reasons why she couldn't be the one thing she feared. But what fucking choice did she have?
"You chose to put them first for a reason," He'd told her that night. His tall frame abuts the wall across from the bed, while she sat there directly across from him, legs securely locked between her arms against her chest. "Parents got to see their kids alive and well tonight, rather than disfigured or lowered six feet under. Don't understand why you're not proud of yourself."
"I wouldn't expect for you to understand." Her eyes, polished with venom and stinging with sorrow lock onto his luminescent blues, the sudden contact sending shivers throughout his body. "It's easy when you have a choice in how you wish to mold your journey."
That makes him laugh a bit, but not with the intent of showing disrespect. "Despite what you may think, you do have a choice. Fuck the consequences, do whatever makes you proud of the person you're becoming. I don't know whose voice is inside your head telling you otherwise, but just know, they're wrong."
"That's the thing," she grips the fabric of her sweatpants, refusing to reciprocate eye contact again. Especially not after the thoughts she had during tonights incident.
Shame. It was there again. "Neither choice would have made me proud of myself. Either way, my choices will wind up hurting me. No two ways about it."
"Is that so?" His tone was calm and steady. It was so flat that Satomi could hardly detect the rise and fall of his voice, or even just how intently his gaze had been fixated on her conflicted form. There wasn't a clear cut solution he could provide her because there was still so much he didn't know about her and the nature of her enrollment. As a member of one of the three great clans, Gojo had been well-educated on her families history, should he ever need to intervene. As a last resort, of course. But he couldn't help but wonder just how tainted the Furusato's have become in recent years. Because how could a fifteen year old girl hold so much regret in the decision to save the lives of two elementary school children over protecting herself and her comrades, plus, exorcising the cursed spirits? Not like they suffered any casualties, the only ones truly at risk were the kids. Yet selfishness was an option she battled against.
Help me to understand, Furusato.
〄
"You know 'Tomi," the blindfolded man turns his head slightly, just enough to peek over his shoulder at the unlikely guest. "When I said fuck the consequences back then, I didn't mean literally."
He boasts a playful grin, the sensitivity of the situation seemingly forgotten.
"My mistake."
AUTHORS NOTE ∞ I thought I'd dabble around with different POVS without making it too obvious lol. In the beginning, I think it's pretty clear who's narrating Gojo's analysis. Or, maybe it isn't. Let me know if you figured it out! :D
