Maybe We Should Go Back

Stay in the castle (a critique of SCOTUS and purity culture)

In light of all that's happened this week with SCOTUS and the threat of religious fascism taking over America, I was reminded of a disturbing story I was told at my Christian school. This story, even at the time, didn't sit well with me but I didn't understand why. It bothered me. I just couldn't get it out of my head.

The story was told to us by our Bible teacher, a woman whose name was Ms. Keller I think, who was an overly pious, sickly sweet, bigoted hypocrite of the worst kind. The kind who you can't even debate or criticize because they'll just smugly recite scripture at you. The kind that professes to love you as they rail against literally everything that makes you a person. The kind that loves the "sinner" but hates your "sin." That kind.

Keller was speaking to our class of girls about how to remain "pure." (I say that word with quotations because the concept of purity in Christian culture is so disgusting I refuse to imply that its ideology is even remotely related to the dictionary's definition of the word pure). Note that when I say "pure" going forward I am referring to the Christian idea independent of the word's actual definition.

Christian Purity is a concept that tells you to remain a virgin until marriage. Not just a virgin though. A no-making-out, no-masturbating, no lusting type of virgin. As you can imagine, telling teenagers (male or female) to completely shut down all sexual thoughts/urges leads to nothing but a seriously guilt-ridden adolescence built on a foundation of lies, at best. At worst, you not only weren't able to conquer this Herculean task of going through puberty without thinking about sex or acting on sexual impulses in any way, but people found out about it too. Now you are no longer "pure." (And let me just say, not ONE of these people involved in purity culture adhere to remaining pure based on their own definition. It is physically impossible. At the very least, everyone thinks about sex and the vast majority of people also masturbate regularly. Therefore it is safe to assume there has never been one actual "pure" person in all of Christianity's history, but they will preach this shit until they are blue in the face (or more likely blue in the balls)). But I digress.

Now when people find out you're no longer pure, here's how it goes: if you're a guy, it's honestly not really a big deal. The "sin" is treated the same as telling a lie. A kind of, "Ah you fucked up but it's okay, just try harder next time." But if you're a girl? You're dirty. You're damaged. You're done. I read one person's account of having to stand in front of the class in a line of people with a piece of tape. The first person tapes it to themselves for a few seconds and then passes it to the next. The next person will still be able to stick it to themselves but it'll be a little loose, littered with fibers from the previous kid's shirt. By the end of the line, the tape is so grubby it won't stick to the last person's shirt. This, they were told, is like a girl who sleeps around. She's useless, gross, used up and only worthy of being garbage. What else can this skit imply? Is there ANY other conclusion we are supposed to come to? The boy gets a frown, the girl gets the garbage can.

This is the premise for the story we were told, which was called "Stay In the Castle." It's your typical fairy tale about a princess. This princess lives in a castle with her wealthy, loving father The King. The King has always told her that someday a handsome prince will come and marry her, and she will go away to be with him and live happily ever after. There's just one rule: she has to stay in the castle and not allow herself to be tempted by hot guys in the village. Surprise! She is subsequently tempted by a hot guy in the village. Not only is she tempted, she falls in love with him.

"But I'm not supposed to leave the castle," gasped the princess, losing herself in her lover's stormy eyes. (Decided I'd have some fun with the retelling because what good is this story anyway? Lol)

"Oh, insert-princessy-name, if you'll come away with me I will make all your dreams come true! Just tell me you love me. I'm desperate for you! I can't sleep! You're all I want! If you don't come with me tonight I'll throw myself off the cliffs!"