The Conqueror Of The Moon Boy

chapter 4:- look for signs

It only took a few days after The Incident (Sirius thought about it solemnly every waking moment) for Remus to function normally within the group, and a couple of days after that to feel comfortable one on one with Sirius. Remus was always quickest to forgive Sirius, no matter how big he messed up. By the second week of November the Marauders were back in action as if nothing had happened. Sirius didn't know whether to be grateful that Moony was able to put it out of his mind so quickly or not since it occupied a majority of Sirius' thoughts.

November turned into December, bringing endless tests and a Remus-enforced ban on pranks until after the holidays. Apparently "listening to you three chatter on like monkeys" wasn't great for his concentration. While Remus occupied a large table in the library with Lily between classes and Prefect rounds and Quidditch on break until after the holidays, James and Sirius found themselves alone in the dormitory more often lately.

"Pads, I'm your brother right?"

Sirius was lost in thought, trying to figure out how he fell so hard for his best friend and what to do about it since drunkenly daring him to snog didn't work out. "Of course you are, but why are you bringing this up all of a sudden?" Sirius rolled over on his side to face James who was already sitting on the edge of his bed, staring at him.

"I bring this up because you're hiding something from me. Something is up with you, and I think Moony is involved."

James wasn't usually this perceptive, it was more Pete's area of expertise, but nobody knew Sirius better than James did. It was time to come clean. Hopefully Prongs would be able to help him sort out what to do since he gave the best advice (after Moony of course).

"Okay Prongs, you're right. There is something up with me and Moony. Don't get mad, I can't control these things and believe me, I tried, I tried so hard...but I fancy Moony. No, it's more than that, I love him. I'm in love with him, James." Sirius hadn't intended to reveal just how bad he had it for his best friend, but something in James made people feel safe confiding in him.

"Oh Pads, thank you for telling me. I'm sorry I sort of forced it out of you though." He looked sheepish, running his hand through his hair in typical James fashion, but continued on. "I think it's brilliant though. You two are perfect for each other! Nevermind the whole soulmate mark business. It honestly makes things easier if you think about it - you're not not soulmates if you both don't have a mark." He started to ramble, but it warmed Sirius' heart to know there was no judgment or disgust, just unwavering support. This is why James was his chosen brother.

Having gotten the confession off his chest, he got up and moved to lie down on James' bed like they have done many times in the past when discussing everything from pranks to homework to family. It was safe and familiar. He tied his hair back to prevent James from tangling it up.

"You bring up an interesting point about the marks, though. On my birthday he told me about the conversation he had with Ravenclaw's knocker, remember?" James hummed in assent, prompting him to go on. "He said they talked about how people without soulmate marks could still have soulmates, but they'd also be unmarked. So you could, in theory, have a soulmate but never have confirmation they're the one."

James let out a long breath. "That's big. Moony gave up on this kind of stuff ages ago, I never thought I'd see the day the lad had any sort of interest in finding love."

"Right!? I was so excited, it was all I could think about all night. Then I went and mucked it all up that night at the party with that stupid dare. Did you see his reaction? He practically downed the rest of the Firewhiskey and ran away rather than sit next to me, knowing I want to have him snog me." Sirius rolled over, burying his face in the pillows. "He came around again because he's Moony, but if that wasn't a sign saying 'I don't fancy you' I don't know what is."