Wherever Souls Fly - Luke's Story

3 Do they turn idiots into gentle spirits?

"Thank you for worrying about me," smiles Luke, the gentle spirit, sitting on a sofa and looking like Vlad's identical twin once again – red shorts, white T-shirt, guitar on his knees. "You've had some interesting ideas. Do you think you'll actually find out where the City Council keeps a list of corpses stored in the depot?"

Pete is optimistic that he will be able to persuade the head of the residents' registration office:

"According to the transparency law, the administration has to grant journalists access to documents like that, at least in an anonymised form. Information privacy may make it a bit difficult to get names and addresses, but once we know where the list is, you can take a look at it at night, Luke."

Again, it is Muhammad who finds the fly in the ointment:

"Okay, let's assume that Luke finds his real name and his family's address. Then he goes there, rings the doorbell, and says, 'Hi Mom and Dad, I'm your son's spirit. Can you please organise a funeral service for me so that I can find my eternal rest?' I'll bet they'll either beat him up or call the police. Because no one believes in spirits, and Luke looks like a Filipino actor, not like a German student or whatever he was before he died. And even if they didn't kick him out right away, they would ask him questions about his youth, but he can't remember anything."

Pete sighs:

"This is not my boyfriend, the Moroccan Menace that I know. Why are you so negative? Don't you think that Luke will remember some facts from his childhood once he gets to his family's place and meets his folks?"

Freddy rushes to his aid:

"He can at least prove that he's a spirit. I mean, he could switch the light on and off, and he could disappear and suddenly turn up in another room or something like that."

"If someone came to my house and switched the lights on and off, or played any other magic trick, I'd still call the police," moans Muhammad. "Or I'd think I was on 'Candid Camera'."

"I think we should give it a try," I try to put an end to this discussion. "Muhammad, just imagine you were in Luke's shoes. Wouldn't you want to find a place where your soul would find eternal peace?"

"If I were in Luke's shoes, I'd try to not change anything about my current situation. Guys, just think about it. I could travel in time, I could materialise wherever I want, and I could fuck around, pretending to show people their true selves. I'd look like a Filipino movie star, and I could sing and play the guitar. Honestly, that would be a dream come true."

"Do you really think so?" Luke asks him. "Wouldn't you miss your parents and your sisters? Wouldn't you miss your boyfriend? I mean, fucking around may be nice for some time, but as a spirit you'll never be able to have a real relationship. And what if you break one of the major rules? You're exactly the guy who would do that. Then you'd be wandering around at night scaring the hell out of people you used to love."

We all think that there will be some obstacles to overcome before Luke can be reunited with his family, but after Luke's speech even Muhammad finally agrees that we won't know if it will work if we don't try.

Of course it is Pete, our strategist, who comes up with a plan. One of his dad's friends is a journalist with the local newspaper.

"He's always liked me, and if I ask him to find out about the depot, he'll do that for me. He's a little nosy, though, so he will want to know why I'm interested in this, and as he notices a lie very easily, I'll have to tell him the truth..."

"...which he is sure to believe." Muhammad's tone is caustic. Pete is getting a little irritated, which does not happen too often.

"Hell, can you stop nagging, please? You're getting on my nerves. I told you that the guy likes me, and he'll believe the story if he meets Luke."