lies | loid forger (spy x family)

1

"tsuki, how do you like this shirt?" you ask, holding up a shirt bedazzled with beads. 

your best friend, tsuki, snatches the shirt from your hand and frowns. "this? is ugly. you're never going to get a husband with this on." 

"i-i wasn't trying to impress anyon-" tsuki pulls you into the dressing room. "if you REALLY want to get someone, you have to look good."

what? since when is tsuki giving me dating advice?! you think.

"hey, hey, hey. it's not like you're in a relationship." you roll your eyes and twist on your heel and out of the dressing room. 

"but i can still give you dating advice!" she shouts out from the dressing room. you're already almost out of the store when you hear a little girl shouting. 

you stop to try and listen to the little girl. "papa! do you not want me?!" she cries. you peek over the shirts to try and get a look at her. a little girl that looks way to young to be talking with pink hair.

her supposed father is standing there red as a tomato. he has plenty of groceries in his hand. 

then, you hear him whisper to his supposed daughter. "i'll get you peanuts if you shut up."

tsuki spots you and turns you around quickly. everything turns blurry until you come back into focus. "you're supposed to be looking for shirts for the party, y/n!"

you see the little girl perk up immediately after her father said that he'd get her peanuts. she wipes up her tears and take his hand. 

"hey, didn't we buy peanuts a couple hours ago?" you ask tsuki loudly. the little girl looks at you before tugging her fathers pants. 

she whispers, "that person has peanuts." she points to you. 

tsuki replies. "yeah, we did. why? you hungry? plus, i thought those peanuts were for me."

you open tsuki's backpack and take out the pack of peanuts. you tap her fathers shoulder. "for your, uh, daughter." 

he smiles and thanks you. "here you go, anya. this nice person decided to give their peanuts to you. say thank you."

anya looks at you with an intense look on her face. like she's reading your mind. 

he puts his hand out and smiles. "loid forger. and you are?" 

"y/n l/n. pleasure to meet you." you turn back to look at the expression on tsuki's face. she's grinning. 

you turn back to loid and smile. "i have a favor. since i gave your daughter peanuts." 

i need to ask him to be my plus one for the party, but he might have a wife. you think. 

"sure, what is it?" loid asks.

anya starts tugging on her fathers pants again. "i miss my mama! i want her back...i can't believe she's dead." 

oh. you think. well maybe he doesn't have a wife.

"i was thinking...maybe you could be my plus one to a party? for work." you stutter. 

loid clears his throat. "i'd love to. under one condition." 

he leans forward and whispers in your ear. "you pretend to be anya's mother. for work."

being a plus one to a party isn't hard work. but to try and be a mother?! i mean...i'm going to have to live with this man that i've only known for 5 seconds. you think.

tsuki whacks your shoulder. "hello?! what are you guys talking about?" 

you push her away and turn back to loid. "uh...i'll have to think about it. here, put your number in my phone. i'll text you when i'm ready, 'kay? by the way, the party is tomorrow night. i'll text you the address." 

"take your time. i'll be sure to be there." loid says to you after putting his number in your phone. he hands your phone back to you. 

you put the contact as 'loid' and stick your phone in your pocket. "great, thanks." 

you give anya a tiny wave and pull tsuki out of the store. as you both walk through the mall, she grips your shoulder tightly. "alright, what was that about?"

"it was just a nice...encounter." you shoot her a side smile. she slaps you across your face. "stop being so stupid, y/n! tell me the truth." she demands, holding both of your hands. 

"fine, but don't tell anyone. especially at the party. i asked him to be my plus one for the party and he accepted but he told me i had to be anya's moth-" 

"who's anya?" tsuki raises her eyebrow. you sigh loudly. "the little girl. probably his daughter or something." you reply. 

"continue." 

"he wanted me to be anya's mother in exchange for being the plus one to the party. and he said that it was for work! who gets another person to fully be the mother figure in a little girls life for WORK?!" you shout. you immediately cover your mouth and anxiously look around the room to see if anyone heard. 

"are you going to have to do this forever? what if he kidnaps you? you already did him a favor, you shouldn't have to do 2 things! but i mean, he was kinda cute..." tsuki blabbers. she stops herself before she could say any more.

she snaps back into reality. "did you say yes?" 

you look down. "no...i told him i'd think about it. i have his number." you say. 

tsuki sneakily takes your phone from your pocket and goes into your contacts. she presses the call button before you could get the chance to stop her. 

"hi, is this loid?" tsuki asks him in her super accurate impression of your voice. 

"yes. have you thought about your answer already?" he asks through the line. tsuki replies with, "yup. i'll accept to be anya's mother."