The Halal Relationship

Chapter 4 - What If

Me and Simon have been talking more and more recently, and I don't mean occasionally, but on a regular basis. Which, if you ask me, is kind of crazy, but I can't say I'm not enjoying it.

It hasn't just been me, though; Alexandra speaks to him frequently, although it's clear she doesn't like him the way I do.

I, Alexandra, and Simon have this group chat, and those two use it a lot.

To be honest, I have no idea what they talk about, but they have hour-long conversations about everything and nothing. Because of those two, I wake up every morning with 400+ Discord notifications. It's okay, though, at least Alexandra approves of him. Actually, I'm not sure if she does, but I'm just going to assume she does.

However, I think that this group chat has brought us closer together. It allows me and him to talk while still being surrounded by other people, so it's not all one on one. Who better to play the third wheel than Alexandra? I'm only joking, for the most part.

Of course, we still have one-on-one conversations regularly, probably at least three times per day, and they are usually for a while. They're fun though, again, I can't say I don't enjoy them.

Though, I do have one confession to make about our friendship right now. We've never actually seen each other in person.

Well..okay, we've seen each other but we haven't seen each other.

I've been dying to talk to him in person, and he just asked to meet up at school on Monday. But I'm not sure if I'm prepared for that. I'm not going to be able to talk to him alone, so Alexandra will be there. We're both fine with it, so it's not a big deal, and I'm hoping she can carry the conversation, because we both know me and him will be awkward.

Although, I did have to beg her to come because we both know I can't talk to that guy on my own.

He does seem to be very excited about it, but I'm not going to lie, he seems like the biggest pussy ever. He tried to meet Alexandra in person, but it was more awkward than anything.

He seems to be more confident in himself this time, but I'm still doubtful that he'll actually show up. I guess only time will tell.

Sunday

Simon can't stop talking about the meet-up. He's practically dying over it. The funny thing is that we both know this isn't going to go as planned.

This meeting could only be awkward. There's no getting around it.

I'm not trying to be negative, but Alexandra completely agrees. I'm worried that all we'll do is awkwardly stand in front of each other and make eye contact.

28 hours 20 minutes.

That's how much time I have before I have to see him. Obsessive, I know. But, at this point, I'm counting down the minutes. I mean, it's all that's being spoken about, so how am I not supposed to think about it?

I'm overthinking this way too much..

But what if it's uncomfortable? What if things don't go exactly as planned? What if he keeps quiet? What if he's uneasy? What if I'm uneasy? What if I become too afraid to show up? What if Alexandra doesn't show up? What if he doesn't show up?

It's too much to think about all the what-ifs.

But it's fine, right? What could possibly go wrong?