Until your Last Breath

Most people think that when you are the youngest, you are the favorite and spoiled one, but they are wrong. Because in my situation, I was the one who was left out and most likely ignored by them. Well, that's literally not my ate's fault naman but why do I always feel that she is taking everything away from me? Because she has all the attention, while no one notices me no matter what I do. And i guess that's the reason why im "bitter" and mad at her all the time.

One morning, i saw her preparing our breakfast while our parents were still asleep so i talk to her and said..

"So what is this again? nagpapabibo ka na naman ba?"

She replied "of course not jemi, I just want to surprise them, that's it."

I just rolled my eyes and sit.

Our parents came and saw the delicious foods on the table.

"wow! you prepared this Erica?" - Mom

Erica said "yes mom, i hope u guys like it!"

"Yes of course ikaw pa! Luto mo 'to e" - Dad

And i was there sitting like an invisible as always.

Friday,
Araw ito ng aking recognition and even though my parents and I don't get along, I still hope that they would still watch me graduate in junior high. The ceremony was about to start and im trying to contact them but no one's answering.

It's my turn na umakyat ng stage pero i can't see them. I felt a little emotional as I walked the stage when my name was called because I wanted them to see me and be proud of me at least once. And after the recognition, I received a text from mom saying "we are unable to go, your sister is sick and kailangan niya ng kasama."
I just replied "it's ok, siguro I need to accept the fact that she's your priority."

You guys can't blame me, right? They're literally unfair.

One day, my sister came up to me and said "im sorry, I know it was my fault. Sana I confronted them to go para samahan ka."

I said "yes right, sana ginawa mo nga pero hindi."

"Im really sorry, I know all this time hindi mo nararamdaman yung care and love na para sayo at dahil sakin yun."

I just stared at her and ignore but deep inside I wanted to say that it's not her fault. I felt guilty but my pride was too high para kausapin ko siya.

I suddenly woke up in the middle of the night because I heard a loud noise coming from downstairs and I saw a thief na nakapasok sa house namin. Im too shocked to run so i was there standing and seeing him holding a gun. Habang dahan-dahan akong lumalayo, nakita niya ako at tinutukan ng baril.

"please, huwag mo ituloy." - me while crying*

When the guy was about to shoot me, i saw my mom and dad running and saying "please dont! dont you dare shoot her!"

While they're confronting the guy, i saw a phone and secretly called a police to come over. But my dad suddenly grabbed the thief's gun and they fought.

Nagkaroon ng mga sugat ang lalaki nang biglang tinamaan si dad ng baril at sinunod nya si mom and that moment na ako na ang babarilin ng lalaki, biglang dumating ang aking kapatid na si erica at sinalo ang bala na dapat para sa akin.
And suddenly, tsaka pa lamang dumating ang mga police at dinakip nila ang lalaki and pumunta ako sa aking kapatid and talked to her and said..

"bakit mo 'yon ginawa? you dont have to!" while crying in guilt*

she said "im sorry, we all want to save you. And that's enough reason for you to believe that we love you. I have cancer jemi..that's why."
And she suddenly stopped from breathing. I really cried while saying
"you're unfair! you guys are unfair! u dont have to do this! see? im alone now so what's the point of living? until your last breath, you're still unfair erica."

Its true, I am living alone. But killing myself won't help, it'll prove na sasayangin ko ang sakrispisyo ng mga taong mahal ko. So I have to live even though I suffered.

Until their last breath, magkakasama sila habang ako'y nagiisa.