Through the window

Eighteen

14th May

"I appoligse for my behaviour this week, it was completely unacceptable, I don't know what has gotten into me lately. But I am truly sorry for how I acted." The teacher looks suprised at that but soon her face morphs into a scowl and I want to retract my apology but I know I can't.

My father made me say my appoligise and if I say "just kidding you wrinkly old bitch" like I want to he'll be the first to know about it.

"Very well, how mature of you to appoligse" If you were mature you'd also appoligse, "now sit and don't talk for the remainder of the lesson" I stare at her for a second without blinking but I leave her desk to walk to my own.

She seriously needs to get laid.

I catch Milo giving me a questioning look but I just half shrug and fall into my seat.

"What was that about?" Milo asks, partly frantic as we exit the classroom and file in with the students in the hallway.

"What was what about?" I look to him and he stares at me before giving up. He nods his head to the doors of the building, today is Tuesday and we only had maths today. The others should be finished with their classes later so we said to meet them later on.

Milo wanted to hang before then, just the two of us.

"Come on, let's go" we get into the car when we get outside, we drive with the windows down and the music on. Milo handed me the aux but when the music came out of the speakers;

"I used to wanna kill myself
Came up, still wanna kill myself.
My life is going no where-"

"Well that's enough of that i think" he said as he rips out the cable from my phone and connects it to his own. I scowl at him as he sets off again when the traffic lights turn green, soon Conan grey or whoever is playing.

I've learnt that Milo's favourite singers are, Taylor swift, Harry styles and Conan gray.

And I can't help but laugh at the difference of our taste in music.

I fold my arms so he knows I'm mad but he just chuckles as he takes a right, I whip my head to him and glare and he shuts up. Yeah, you better.

I sit back and listened to the music because I have no other choice.

"Your father was awfully mean
Your favorite color is green
It reminds you of the summer you turned three
Runnin' through sprinklers on your street"

I listen to the lyrics as I stare out in front of me. Can't help but releating, which scares me a little. Seeing how spot on it is.

"Oh, summer child
You don't have to act like all you feel is mild
You don't really love the sun, it drives you wild
You're lyin', summer child"

I shuffle in my seat and turn the radio down, "you alright?" Milo questions and I glance to him with furrowed brows. Wondering how he always knows when I'm not.

"I don't like summer."

We stop at another traffic light and nods slowly, "okay-" "and my favourite colour is green" I tell him and he nods again. Already knowing this yet i can tell he's wondering why I'm saying this.

I turn back to look out the widow in front of me wondering myself why I'm saying this.

Relating to a song is always weird, but relating to a song about your dad being mean is even weirder. It's like it's telling me that its not meant to be that way, it's not normal.