Shitty Love Story

Chapter Two: Trying

At first I was just trying to talk to him, then I was just trying to be held in the arms I had missed dearly for the past three months. No matter how much hurt Keith had caused I, for some reason, came back. When he hugged me as he walked in my door I felt a wave of nausea take over my entire body at once. Keith seemed to know how to do that to me.

"I missed you."

I nodded. I had nothing else to say. First, we talked about how we've been and what we've done lately. Then it moved into whether or not we were missing each other and then he was suddenly rubbing on me like a cat and begging for another chance. I hesitated fir a long time. This wasn't like me and I knew I didn't hesitate before giving people answers. When I realized the gap of time it was taking me to respond I shot out words of agreeance.

That was it. My words catapulted out into the air. It wasn't like I could suck them back before he heard them. I knew that once his ears had a pull of the corner of his mouth and he smiled at me. This led to kissing and me, Harper the horribly stupid, to be orbiting around Keith again.

This is where things got worse than ever. Keith complained that I complained too much. He stopped telling me things, he started going out with friends more often, he disappeared for up to a month at a time. Granted, Keith would text me every single day; every second that he got the opportunity. Those messages became nothing anymore. It was all small talk. All so minuscule to the big picture that I wanted to paint with him.

The main difference between me and Keith was that he had interest in the little things in life and constantly did things that didn't matter whatsoever. I was, even still am, more interested in things that mattered to my future. I was the one who signed online petition to save the bees while Keith was always the one to shop for shit online. I was staying up all night doing homework and he was up all night smoking weed and playing guitar. I never had anything against Keith playing guitar in his band, I just wished he'd have payed more attention to me.

Keith was staring at me while the fork in his right hand hovered near his mouth. He holds his utensils weird... I stared back and flinched when a noodle fell back to his bowl. I'm fairly sure he was talking because I watched as his mouth moved. Yet, words weren't being processed in my head. I'm nodding now so that's a good thing. Probably.

"Harper!"

I flinched and looked Keith in the eye again. He was happy for once. A smile spread on his face when I snapped back into reality. I walked gently over to him, as if I'd break if I took too hard a step. My waist had two snake like arms slithering around them and pulling me in. I couldn't help but let slip my poisonous grin that seemed to be infectious.

That day, I remember specifically, he sat and told me how much he loved me while i leaned against him. I was in the power position. I could have pulled away that day. I missed the opportunity to free myself from being in love with him anymore.

Too bad I'll always be in love with his chocolate brown eyes and crooked smile.