"Peeta." I see him laying in the stream, hurt. Then things shift. I see him as a kid again, tossing me the burnt bread without looking my way. Shifts. We are in the cave, kissing. Shifts. Running for our lives to the Cornucopia. Shift. Cato threatening to kill Peeta. Shift. Leaving the station with Peeta when we got back from the Games. Shift. Saying goodbye to him. The last time I saw him since we got home. We said goodbye and just left, both hurt.
'No, say something to him. Don't let him leave like that!' I tried screaming but no sound came out and we continued walk away from each other. 'No, no, no, no, no, no…!'
"NO! No, no, no, no!" I screamed.
"Katniss! Wake up!" Gale wakes me up and holds me. "It was just a dream, Catnip. You're ok." He soothes me.
I wipe eyes, realizing I was crying. I take deep breathes, hoping to calm myself. After a few minutes, I pull away from Gale and look up at him.
"Thanks."
"Your welcome. Was it about the Games again?" he asks, pulling me back into his heart and stroking my hair.
"Yeah." I lie. I do have nightmares about my time in The Hunger Games, but this isn't one of those. I never have the heart to tell him when I dream of Peeta. Whether they're dreams or nightmares like what I just. Gale and I have been dating since a couple weeks after I got back from the Games. Believe or not, I don't think of that as a day. That day was like a nightmare I couldn't wake up from.
*Flashback*
I had been back home for 3 weeks now. Gale has to work in the mines now he graduated from school so we could only hunt on Sundays, his day off. He had been acting weird since I came back. I thought it because he thought me and Peeta were a couple, but after I told him, he still acted weird. And happier. I didn't understand why at the time and that makes me angry at myself. Why didn't I see it? If I had understood how he felt at the time then maybe I could have changed things. Maybe I could have prevented all of this from happening. But I didn't. At the time, I couldn't figure it out so I finally asked him about. God, I wish that I didn't.
"I'm in love with you, Katniss…. I have been for a while now." he said, scaring me. Love is such a dangerous thing. It destroyed my friendship with Gale and caused me to now live my lie my whole life.
"I…. love you, too." I told him.
*Flashback Over*
But of course I lied. At least about the way I love him. I've always thought of Gale like my brother. I have never gave any thought about loving him in any other way. I didn't, and still don't, love him like that. But how could I tell him that? I didn't want to hurt him. If I told him I didn't feel the same, he'd probably be uncomfortable around me. And what if he started dating someone else and stayed away from? I couldn't take that. So, to try to hold everything together, I lied to him. So we have been dating for months now. Though, they haven't been easy for us. Crying starts echoing down the hall. Jake's up.
"Here, I'll go take care of Jake. So just relax in here, ok, Catnip?" Gale tells me as he leaves the room to take care of our son. Yes, our son. Like I said, things haven't been easy for us. Actually, things seem downright hard. I never wanted kids, which makes things worse. Don't get me wrong, I love my son, but I regret the night we made him.
*Flashback*
It was 3 weeks after I started dating Gale. We were in my house at the Victors Village. We were just hanging out in my new room. Not really doing anything. In fact, he seemed to have a lot on his mind. Which is why I should of knew things would go wrong if I asked about it. But, again, I didn't know and I asked him anyway.
