Smutty one-shots for practice

Not Yours, but Not Anyone Else's Part 1

I may never have had a real relationship, but damn I know when I see one. I saw the love and excitement when he saw her, held her, and had her anywhere near him. They weren't the couple without issues, but they were the couple that I supported. My best friends relationship. He's tall, sorta weird and a little depressed. He's angry at the world and knowing his mom I get it. His blue eyes had seen a lot more than my own but he kept a much brighter smile on his face than I ever accomplished. He was a mess, and his girlfriend? A beautiful girl with a bright smile, so caring and funny. She was always dancing and laughing, no matter how anxious or scared or tired she was always so sweet to everyone. I love my best friend but I know he didn't deserve her. 

Eventually I got myself into a relationship. Asshole with a jacked up truck and no sympathy for anything but himself. I thought maybe his ex was the problem, but the way he treated his own family was like watching an iPad kid in action. But I'm a petty bitch. He wants to see his friends on our anniversary? Okay, I'll get drunk at a house party with a bunch of guys, you don't have to worry about me. He was an ass with all the time in the world but not enough for me. As me and him were slowing down the more of a mess I saw my best friend spiral into. Drink after drink, shots like he was trying to die.

 I stopped by one day, checking in to see what he was doing, he was drunk in the middle of the day. I said, "Hey I just showed your girlfriend my freshly pierced nipples." and all he said was "Ex." I felt horrible. That was a years worth of growth, happiness, memories, pictures, all gone because he didn't make her happy anymore. I mean I get it. There's a point when you feel like pen pals that live right next to each other. It's not fair to anyone to keep that relationship going.

The next day, after those two broke up I was dumped. It hurt. He was my first in everything. He called me his dogs mom I called him Lovely. It wasn't the most surprising, he had been really off lately and I had been asking for him to just have one day with me. It had been a month into our three month relationship. Asking him to spend one day with me, or to communicate his feelings was too much. That's okay though. Instead of me and him spending time together, my best friend and I took a ski trip. It failed, I drove 2 hours for nothing. But that was fine because it was pretty outside, and we had a good time just being in each others presence to where the time passed quickly. From 7:00 am to 11:00 at night we were together and I would do it every day if I could. 

Am I so wrong to want to be the one he spends the night with? I know him, too well really. I know the way he'd speak to me, the way he'd slam me on the bed. I know the way he'd smack my ass when I am doing something. I know the way he'd choke me and tell me I'm a fucking slut for letting him do that to me. I know the condescending tone he'd use when I'd moan or beg. I know he'd love to hear me call him daddy. Is it so wrong to want to be his, even if I know it might not work out? I can see us making sense, but I also know the crash and burn if we didn't line up would be so much worse.

Is it wrong that I want him to fuck me like-

"What are you writing?" Ben asks, perching his chin on my shoulder.

I close my laptop nonchalantly and turn around, "Just something. for class, the usual." I shrug.

"Can I read it? I have no prompt whatsoever for my essay, you asshole I wanna see!" He snatches the computer from my hands and runs to his room, I trail behind him but his practiced steps have an advantage over my own. Pounding on the door and trying the knob I have no luck. So I take a seat in the hall. "Give up already? You were ready to take my door down a moment ago, why do you even care so much huh? It's not even like it's special, it's an essay about Socrates. Stop being a little cum dumpster and let me read it in peace."

"But Ben that isn't actually my essay!" I cry.

"Shhh I'm reading." I huff and get myself ready for what's about to come next. A lot of confusion, maybe a broken friendship. Best case scenario? We pretend it didn't happen. Worst? I lose my best friend.

A few minutes later I hear some stirring. It sounds like he's shoving things around his room. He's probably angry. Shit. What the fuck do I do now?

There's a loud clanging and then the sound of the door being locked. When he opens it I look up from my crisscross sitting position on the floor. He's just standing there, staring down at me. I swallow the dryness in my throat. "Hi?"

He runs his hand through his messy brown locks and looks at the ceiling and then back down at me. "For fucks sake I was gonna pretend that I didn't actually read it but then you looked at me like that and I just- Fuck. Maddie- I, Shit." He sits down on the floor in front of me the same way I was and holds out his pinky, "Are you sure you want this? Are you sure this is alright with you?"

I lock my pinky with his and look him dead in the eye, "I won't tell if you don't." Smiling he removes his hand from mine and stands, pulling me over his shoulder.

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Hey Lovelies! Its been a while since I posted anything, still alive I swear just hit a block and figured this would be a really interesting practice for a story. I may look to this for inspiration but I'm not sure. Either way I will have another part posted when my eyes aren't burning from lack of sleep. I hope to see you soon, don't forget to comment and suggest some prompts for me! 

-2.0