Path of Transformation (Book 1 in the Legends of Erosvold)

CHAPTER 18

If there was one good thing about Samael telling Evi to make Naraka her home, it was that it bestowed upon her limited magical powers. With her newfound skills, she opened a portal and walked through. On the other side, she stepped onto the riverbank in the cave that had been created based on Liam's vision of what he thought the Underworld should look like. If she could have, she would have sent Samael to some far-off land, or she would have transported herself back to Earth. But her magic wasn't that strong. She was confined to the current planet.

Her plan had been to jump back into the water and allow herself the bliss of floating in the Nether. The weightlessness and numbness would have been a welcome relief from the emotions swirling within her. The mixture of anger and sadness was overwhelming, and since she couldn't numb them out with alcohol, the river was her next best option. The thought of her body drifting apart and becoming one with the Universe also meant she wouldn't have to endure the grief of losing Liam. Oblivion sounded like a really good option.

Stepping forward, the toe of her boot touched the water's edge. She was just about to keep moving forward when the crunching of gravel sounded behind her and stopped her. Evi realized that it would have been super easy to just ignore the newcomer and continue with her action, but then she risked him calling others to the area and pulling her once again from her bliss.

"I'm really sorry, Evi," Byron said behind her.

The words caused her throat to tighten and tears to sting her eyes. She squeezed them shut and took in several slow, deep breaths. "You couldn't have known what would happen." She spoke the words softly, afraid her voice would reveal her emotions.

"I know, but you tried to tell me. You said that your family couldn't be trusted." The ground crunched beneath his feet as he took a few more steps closer to her. "I should've listened. I've just been away for so long, I forgot how...rigid the Eros can be."

"It's not your fault. You were only doing what you thought was right."

"And so were you," Byron took another step forward and placed his hand on Evi's shoulder. "Don't blame yourself for what happened to Liam."

The words and the warmth of his touch melted away part of Evi's anger. Exhaustion took over, and her knees felt weak. She sank to the ground and plopped onto her butt, extending her legs in front of her. The sound of water lapping at the shore filled her ears, but since it was an illusion, her feet and legs didn't get wet.

She did blame herself. One of the things that kept running through her mind as Liam was pulled away was why she hadn't stayed on the desert planet like she had planned. Or better yet, why she hadn't taken him to a hospital and then disappeared while they were still on Earth. If she had ducked out when she had wanted to, she wouldn't have to suffer through this loss. The pain would still be there, she didn't doubt that, but she had ways to cope. If she had only refused the Journey at any point before they got to Naraka...

"Who else should I blame? Samael? Don't worry, I don't think he's innocent in any of this. But he wouldn't have known about Liam if we hadn't brought him here."

Byron took a seat next to her, his legs bent so that they wouldn't touch the Nether. "That's fine if you want to blame me. I talked you into this."

Evi scoffed. "You wish you had that much power."

She arched her back and directed her gaze upward. She stared at the points of rock formations as they jutted down from blackness. She wondered what it would take for one of them to fall and put her out of her misery; if she could use her portal magic to make that wish come true. But then she realized that the other power bestowed upon her since she was "home" was eternal life. The ache in her chest grew deeper. Her life on Earth would have been longer than a human's, it was part of her punishment, but being away from the Waters of Life and other sustaining Eros powers, eventually, she would have succumbed to old age. It was one of the few things she looked forward to about her banishment: an end. She didn't have that option anymore, and that made her feel about one thousand times worse than she already had.