We love the feeling of being in love. That ticklish sense in your stomach. That involuntary smiles. That "I-love-this-day-because-I-am-with-you" moments. Yeah, we all love that feeling. But what happens after the butterflies go away? After the fireworks fade into thin air? After everything went from slowmo to no more? What happens after goodbye?
You wake up one morning to an empty inbox. No good morning texts. No I love you's. No nothing. You stare blankly at the last message he sent last night. That's it. End of conversation. You roll to the other side of the bed, still with phone at hand. You kept re-reading the message, hoping that maybe just maybe, it was all just a nightmare that you're going to wake up to any minute now. But no. You pinched yourself and it hurts. Sadly, this is reality. You recited the message in your head. Up until now you cannot absorb the bitter truth. He left you. He knew you are fragile but he left you broken.
You roll over and stared at the ceiling with thousands of thoughts cascading in your head. What have you done wrong? Why had he left you? Do you deserve this? Was this supposed to happen? No. It wasn't supposed to happen because he promised you the moon and the stars. He promised to cross the Carribean seas. He promised to stay by you through storms and quakes. And most importantly, he promised you a forever. I guess forever ended too soon for both of you.
You looked at your phone and scrolled through some photos. You two looked happy there and you wished you could time travel back to the good old days when you were his and he was yours. You felt that familiar pang in your chest. You hate that feeling. Admit it or not, you miss him, how he smiles at you when he sees you walking through that door, how his eyes sparkle at the mere sight of you, how he dresses his best just to impress you on your first date. You miss him. You miss him so bad that it's tearing you apart.
You got up, went to your vanity mirror and stared at the reflection you saw in front of you. Messy hair, ruined mascara, swollen eyes. You look like you've tried every drug in the world. But the only drug that turned you like this is yourself, your thoughts, your inability to accept the fact that things come and go and life doesn't stop for all of that. We meet a lot of temporary people, sweetie. Most of them are not going to stay in our life forever. They come today then leave tomorrow. That's life.
Darling, I know you're hurting. You're hurting too much at the moment but remember that nothing is permanent in this world. Someday you won't remember this pain you thought would last forever and ever. Sometimes we end up being abandoned by someone we thought would never leave but that's okay. It happens. You deal with it and you move on.
Yes, terrible things happen. But those terrible things, they are the ones which save you. They saved you from the wrong one, darling. Don't cry because he left you. Smile because he gave you a chance to find someone better. Be happy despite all this pain because what's happening now is never an accident. There are no such things as accidents. Things happen for a reason. Things happen so you can be the person you ought to become.
I know you miss him to the point that all you wanted to do was to get him back, to get the two of you back together. But hey, if he doesn't make an effort to stay in your life, then why would you even dare to make him stay? Not everyone you lose is a loss. Sweet, little girl, you're young, you're beautiful, you're perfect. Don't let one single guy to let you think otherwise. You may think that he's the best, the one whom the heavens sent out for you, the one who made your bitter world shine but sweetie, he's not. He's the one who made your eyes tear and your heart bleed. He's the thoughts in your head that ripped you apart. You don't deserve that kind, dearie. You deserve someone who will be willing to fight for you whatever the odds may be. Someone who will give up everything to be your last love. Someone who deserve the kind of love you are willing to give. Don't you dare settle for anything less.
Let him go. Let him do whatever he thinks is right for both of you. Let him walk away and don't chase after him. Respect yourself enough to walk away from the things that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you happy. Keep in mind that you've done your part. You waited, you loved, you even fought for him even if it was an obvious loss. And even after all of the sacrifices and hurting that you've been through, he still chose to go. Let him. You don't need those kind of people in your life. Someone better is coming for you. Waste your time waiting for The One to come to you instead of waiting for the wrong one to come back. Smile, little princess. Raise your head up and pick up your fallen tiara. Your best days haven't happened yet.
