Ainsleys POV
I always seem to fail at life. I'm sorry i wasn't enough for you Aspen. I tried. That's all that matters. I give up now.
Why is this park so empty? Well maybe that's a good thing. I don't really want to be near people right now. It wouldn't be good for me. People tend to make me angry. Which is why I don't have many friends. I tend to get very nervous in front of other people. I just don't like talking to people.
I should probably get home soon... Not that my parents care anyways. They never cared. It was always about Charlotte. The straight A student. Then there's be. Flunking lots of classes. Not that I care.
This is nice. I haven't been alone in such a long time. I lik-
"AH!" I screamed, falling to the ground.
"Oh gosh, I'm so sorry. I didn't see you there." A voice said, the person leaning down to look at me. I avoided eye contact and didn't say a word. He cleared his throat and stood up. He rubbed the back of his neck, almost like he was nervous. I slowly stood up, not wanting to seem like a freak.
I stood up fully, and looked at the boy. My god, he was attractive. Fuck, he was more than attractive. He was hot as fuck! Oh god, I probably looked like a fucking seal, standing next to him. I looked at the ground, not wanting him to fully see my face.
"Are-uh.. Are you okay?" The boy asked. I nodded quickly. He lightly smiled at me, and I think I smiled back. I hope I did. "So uhm... What's your name?"
I looked up, and the boy gasped. I bit my lip and looked down. Why did he gasp?! I must look terrible. Oh no.. "My.. My name is Ainsley." I said. He smiled at me again.
"My name is Cody. It's wonderful to meet you." He said. I suddenly seemed comfortable with this boy. And I have no idea why...
"Well, it was very nice talking but I've got to get home. I really hope we get to talk again." Cody said, smiling. I smiled back and nodded slightly.
Cody began to walk away, and I sighed heavily. I should have asked for his number. That would've been a great idea. I turned the opposite way that Cody turned and began walking home. This boy had me feeling some type of way. I actually talked to him. It's really hard for me to talk to people i don't know well. It surprised me.
I have social anxiety. It's not great. If you don't know what that is, I'll explain.
When you have social anxiety, you are very anxious about being with other people and you have a hard time talking even though you wish you could. You get very self conscious around other people. You get scared that people are constantly judging you. You stay away from places where other people might be, which is why I go to the park late. You have a hard time making and keeping friends, which is why I only have like one or two friends, that I'm not very close with. You blush, tremble, or stutter when you talk to people, which is why I had such a hard time speaking to Cody. Having social anxiety sucks ass. I go to therapy for it, but it never seems to help. I've tried so hard to get rid of it, but nothing is helping.
Once I got into the driveway of my house, the porch light flicked on and I knew I was in deep shit. I slowly stepped into the house and both my parents stood there, tapping their foot. "Do you have any idea how late it is, young lady?!" My mother said. I rolled my eyes and pushed past them both, running up the stairs to my room. I slammed the door and fell onto my bed immediately falling asleep, wishing to talk to Cody again soon.
Author's Note
Hey guys! I realize that this chapter is short, but they will get longer once we get more into the story. This story is hopefully going to be great and I really hope you all enjoy it!!
Love you all,
zo
(word count: 726)
