A Mother's Embrace

CHAPTER 7

David, who came from a bath, jumped excitedly around the dining table as I was having tea.

"Mama, where are we going next?" he asked excitedly.

"To the lake! Olivia has never been there."

Suddenly David grew quiet. He retreated to a chair near Amanda and fiddled with his fingers.

"What happened, love?" Amanda asked, stroking his hair.

"Lake scares me", said David looking down, his voice almost a whisper.

I looked puzzled at David who had now shrunken into a ball, avoiding eye contact.

"Baby, what happened?"

"Lake is bad!" David said, shrinking more and more into himself.

"Is he okay?" I was concerned. It was my first time seeing him like this.

"Oh! He is. It is just one of his moods. David fell into the lake as a kid. He has been scared of the lake ever since."

I mouthed an Oh! David was still fiddling with his fingers and avoiding any eye contact. I got up from my chair and kneeled down on the floor beside him.

"David, since I am here, you don't need to be scared. I will make sure that you are safe." I said, trying to reassure him.

"It is not safe for you either!" he said, slightly lifting his head up and looking at me.

"What?"

"Mother doesn't like anyone visiting the lake."

I looked at Amanda puzzled.

"David, when did I ever say that? Darling, why don't you go to your room and rest. Mrs. Ben will take you"

"But Mama-" he was interrupted by Mrs. Ben who lifted him off from the chair and walked out. When they reached the door, David looked back and said,

"Be careful!"

I looked at him puzzled. As if reading my mind, Amanda got up and took my hand.

"Don't worry. Sometimes David acts out like that. I hope you can understand."

"Oh, it's fine!" I said.

During the long walk to the lake, very few words were spoken. Even though Amanda was trying to have small talk, I was too engrossed in the events that happened a few minutes later. The sudden change in David's behavior worried me and the way Amanda could readily give explanations as if it was said and rehearsed before, disturbed me. I started to wonder if Amanda was the kind mom she said to be or someone who took advantage of her autistic child. If Amanda was putting up a front of a caring mother, she was doing it very well. But then unless for very rare occasions, David seems to be in love with his mother. He doesn't show any signs of a child who is being abused by his mother. So, I decided to let go of my thoughts as mere suspicions and not to draw conclusions with no solid facts.

The lake was beautiful. My view from the balcony did not fully show its beauty. It looked calm and graceful. The scenery looked just like a painting. I stood by the bank and slowly took in its beauty.

"This lake is beautiful!"

"I know right! I believe this is the most beautiful place in this castle. The owners before us also loved this lake so much and they asked us to take care of it well."

"Oh! This place is really peaceful. I can now understand why you sneak walks here at night"

Amanda let out a nervous laugh.

"Yes, this is where I come when I need some alone time."

"You are lucky to have such a place."

"Thank you! If you need to take a break or to sort your thoughts out, please feel free to come here. Now that you have come here once, I think you will know how to come here alone."

"That is so kind of you! Thank you so much! I think I can find my way here alone."

"If you need help, you can ask Mrs. Ben or Richard to take you here."

"Richard?"

"It's the boy that takes care of the garden and other works. You might have seen him."

"Oh, the guy with a limp?"

"Yes!"

"He looks a bit creepy. Whenever he sees me he just stares and that gives me the chills."

"Haha, don't worry. He is just like that. He grew up in this castle and hence has a little more freedom than the rest of the workers. Don't mind him. If at all he gives you any trouble, do let me know."

"Sure", I said with a smile. There was this thing with Amanda, no matter how unsettled you are, she has the ability to settle things for you. It might be the way she speaks or her demeanor. But something about her has this calming effect almost to the extent that it sometimes feels like you are hypnotized.

"Feel free to take a walk around, towards the back is a small forest. Nobody goes in there, other than that, the rest of the place is all yours to explore!" Amanda said with a reassuring smile.

I walked along the side of the lake. The water was really still. It was as if this lake was separated from the rest of the world and it was covered with a blanket of stillness. I felt my every worry drain off me. It felt like someone had embraced me and consoled me. My eyes welled up.

As I was walking along the bank, I saw a small slab of stone, carved to form a seat. From there one could enjoy the beauty of the lake and also the grounds of the castle. It was a position that provided calmness but also helped you to be aware of the movement around you. On the seat, a book lay face down. I lifted it up and found the binds to be wet, it looked like someone left it there to dry. The cover seemed familiar and I turned it over to see the book's name.

"The Bell Jar", it was the same book I saw in David's cupboard. "Why is it here?" I thought.

"Amanda, this book, why is it here? I saw it last time in David's cupboard."

She looked at my hand and then her face went white. But with the speed and precision of someone who has gone through this over and over again, she said calmly, regaining the color in her face, "I had taken it out for a quick read, and last night it slipped and fell into the water. I left it there to dry."

"Oh!" I said, placing the book back on the seat.

"It's getting late, why don't we head back?"

"Sure." I said, walking back. As we moved away from the lake, I looked back to get one more glance of the lake. Suddenly, the water ruffled a bit and something that looked like a piece of fabric floated to the top.

"Amanda!" I said holding her hand. "Look, something floated up on the water."

"What?" and then suddenly she stood right before me, blocking my view of the lake. "It's nothing, you might probably be tired."

As I was being taken back to the castle, my thoughts still were locked on the fabric I saw. I was sure it was not a hallucination. I clearly saw the fabric. A blue ombré fabric.

Amanda didn't let go of my hands until we reached the castle. Just as we entered, David came out from the kitchen with a croissant in his hands.

"How was the walk Ms. Olivia?"

"It was good." I said, suddenly switching my attention back to the present.

"I am glad you enjoyed it. Mrs. Ben made fresh croissants. Come, let's eat."

"I will take a quick shower and join you."

"Please come Ms. Olivia!" said David, tugging at my sleeves.

"Let her rest and come darling. She won't be long. Right Olivia?" said Amanda. The question seemed almost like an order.

"Sure! I will come back soon", I said and walked quickly to the stairs. Just as I was climbing the stairs, I saw something that froze me on my tracks. The fabric I saw in the river was the same as the dress which the woman in the painting wore. I stood in front of the painting, shocked and wondering what was going on.

"This definitely is not a coincidence." I said to myself as I stood shocked in front of the painting.