Hopeless (Ashtonevillamore Series #1)

Chapter 4

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"Someone I like studies on STEM." she said while fiddling with her fingers. Hindi naman masama kung isipin kong ako yun diba? I mean, who couldn't like me anyway? "Who?" I asked,

She paused for a minute, and said,

"My childhood bestfriend."

Oh.

I hummed in response, when in reality parang sinasaksak na ako sa kaloob looban. We were silent for a bit, so I got on my phone and played games for awhile. Until our food arrived, parang nasusuka ako. The food was delicious, pero wala akong malasahan.

"I'll just go to the bathroom." I said while going up. She nodded, while I hurriedly went there.

When I was finally in the bathroom, I washed my face. Naluluha ako na hindi ko alam. I don't even know what's wrong with me. Hindi ko mawari kung ano ang mali at kung ano ang dahilan nito. I stared at myself in the mirror. Umiling iling na lamang ako at lumabas. When I was on our pwesto, I saw Naomi was done with her food, she gestured me to continue with a smile on her face. I hope someday I'm the cause of your smile. I smiled back.

I noticed the guys earlier were staring at us again with a smug on their faces and their brows rose up, clearly enjoying the view of me slurping my ramen. I was obviously uncomfortable so I looked away and still continued eating. I'm on my edge already, so stop flaming the flames. Kapag sinapak ko yan, baka imbis na magpakulong ako, ako pa yung makulong.

Biglaang tumayo si Naomi sa upuan niya and sat beside me sa hindi kaalamang dahilan. Nangalumbaba siya at iniharap ang mukha niya sa akin, dahilan kung bakit natakpan ang mga lalaking tumitingin sakin kanina. Palihim akong ngumiti.

Kanina parang nadudurog yung puso ko, tapos ngayon tumitibok na ulit kahit lusaw na? What the fuck?

Tinititigan niya ako habang kumakain, but honestly, I don't give a fuck. You can look at me whenever you want. Only me, sakin lang.

When I was done eating, pinauna na ako ni Naomi sa labas. She told me to wait outside kaya tumango ako. I sulked the whole time, nagikot ikot ako to look at items near the restaurant. As usual, wala akong nagustuhan. Nothing can ever top Naomi bought earlier. Actually, wala akong alam kung bakit niya iyon ginawa. I could've just lend my whole money and add hers para complete. She paid it with her money herself without hesitation the moment I looked at her.

At talagang tuluyan na akong ngumiti. You can't keep acting like that when we both know you can't be mine.

My smile instantly turned into a sigh.

"Xiara!" I heard someone said my name. I looked behind, and saw Naomi being breathless. I tilted my head, "I was looking for you everywhere." she said while putting her hands in my shoulder. Right. This is fine. She likes someone else, I have to learn how to accept that. I smiled bitterly.

"I was going around near the restaurant. You were so bagal, what did you do ba?" I asked curiously with my hands crossed while looking at her. Alam ko namang nagbayad lang siya ng bill. I kept asking to pay for our lunch but she insisted kaya hinayaan ko nalang.

"Wag mo nalang alamin." she said while ruffling my hair. While we were exiting the store, "I want to buy this specific book eh." I said while pouting to stay with her longer. She nodded, then gestured for us to go. While we were walking towards the escalator, I noticed something.