Mike and I [ MIKE X Y/N]

Part 11- The Park

A-lot has happened over the last few days. From the span of December 2nd to December 5th: Mike and El broke up, Lucas and Max  made up, Will got a boyfriend, and Dustin was dumped by his girlfriend. There's lots to cover, so I'll start with the least important and work my way up. Susie sorta/kinda told Dustin they couldn't be together because of her religious differences and backgrounds. Susie isn't allowed to make a mistake- ever, and Dustin makes many mistakes, especially when it comes to using his significant other's understanding of modern technology to change his Spanish grade. As far as I know, Dustin's not phased by the separation, but I'm not sure he actually understands that he was in fact broken up with. Lucas and Max, well, I guess they promised not to fight anymore, (consistently) not fight anymore. And Will got a boyfriend! That cute boy he was talking to at the roller rink asked him to hang out, one thing led to the other and they smooch smooched, but, they're keeping their relationship on the down-low, so I have to remember to keep it to myself, so note to self: Keep Will's exciting new relationship to yourself, (but I'm sure that the neighborhood cat can know too). Lastly, El and Mike diverged harsher than Robert Frost's "The Road Not Taken". I wasn't there to witness the split, but I heard it was pretty brutal. Apparently, El didn't love Mike anymore, so she broke up with him. I've only heard through the grapevine, so I'm not sure if it's entirely accurate, but I know for a matter of fact they did break up. I haven't spoken to Mike since our most recent encounter, I try not to act tetchy when Mike's around, but I'm still frustrated with him. It's been really awkward lately in our group, because Mike and El aren't together the girls (El, Max and myself) mostly hang out on our own, and the boys ( Dustin, Lucas, Will and Mike) mostly go off on their own. Except for the rare occasion we'll mingle altogether, the groups pretty torn. I wish it wasn't, but I guess that's just the way it is. Yesterday I felt too sick to go to school, I haven't slept well lately- I keep getting nightmares. If the year was 1986 I'd be panicked, but Hawkins has moved on, and so has Vecna. I keep thinking that I should tell someone just in case, but we're not really speaking to the boys all that much, and I wouldn't want to worry Max or El. Especially Max and El. Max was in the hospital for two excruciatingly long months after she survived the curse, and I wouldn't want to suddenly spring on the possibility that I might have said insidious curse when I probably, most likely, in all likelihood, don't. I mean, I haven't had a single nosebleed in the last month, and the only time my head hurt was one day last week when I wasn't drinking a substantial amount of water. Besides the nightmares, I'm Vecna free.
So it's settled: I am not going to mention my recent nightmares to anyone, at all, at any point, ever, not even Will.
Ok, maybe Will. Although, Will and I...we've been pretty distant lately because of the breakup and his boyfriend, and I haven't really seen him since that night at the roller rink. We were supposed to meet up today at the park, but he hasn't showed up yet. Currently, I'm sitting on one of the slides, using my legs to push my feet back and forth in the tam-bark, noticing how good it felt to have the tam bark brush against my feet back and forth, and back and forth, and back and forth, and back and forth, and back and-
"Hey."
Mike stood parked in-front me, stiff as a mannequin. I confusedly watched as he shifted his bloodshot eyes around. He looked tired- as if he hadn't gotten a good nights sleep in days. His eyes were wet stricken with preceding tears. I wanted to ask if he was ok- but there was no point, I knew he wasn't. It was apparent from first glance, his eyes were dull and sullen, and I'd looked at Mike's eyes enough to know what they looked like happy. But, instead of shining like a lamp light, they felt dark. I looked at him and I watched his eyes until I felt myself traveling beneath, through the comfort of their honey brown color, past the beauty of their glassy tint, and into the true pool of darkness far beneath.
I don't know what came over me, but I scooted over until my legs pressed against the sides of the yellow slide, and I gestured for Mike to sit down. He cautiously sat and I immediately felt his legs brush against mine, but I didn't say anything. I loved and hated it. Mike sat for a while, arms criss crossed hovering over his legs, intermittently glancing at me and then back at the ground. And eventually he stopped looking at me. He just sat. After a few minutes he started to cry. I didn't know what to do, so I let him cry. I let him cry and I scooted closer to him. I let him cry and I stroked his hair . I let him cry and he sobbed into my shoulder. I let him cry and I wrapped my arms around his back. I let him cry and he started to drip tears onto my shirt, and it was my favorite shirt, but I let him. Because I loved him. People need someone who will let them express themselves, and I let him cry. I held him tightly for a while, stroking his hair as the usual tension soared through the air above us. I stroked his hair as the wind brushed mine to my face, and I let my hair sit uncomfortably against my cheeks, itching against my skin. Finally, I felt Mike's head rise from my shoulder, and he gave me the smallest smile before turning his head back at the ground.
"Mike." I stated, watching as he folded his eyebrows together and tilted his head closer to the pavement.
"Is it El?" I asked cautiously.
"No."
"Is it the breakup?"
"No."
"Is it the party about the breakup?"
"No."
"Is it your family?"
"No."
"Is it your family about the breakup?"
"No."
"Is it school?"
"No."
"Is it school about-"
"I'm not crying about the fucking breakup!" Mike yelled sharply.
I pinched my eyebrows together and turned to face Mike. If he was going to yell at me he had to look at me while he did it.
"Then what was it?" I said calmly; defeated.
I had an urge to ask if it was me, but I was too scared he would say yes. Or maybe I was too scared he'd say no.
Mike rolled his eyes and covered his head, his arms wrapped around like a tight metal shell.
"El didn't break up with me."
"What?" I asked appalled, starting to feel that familiar bolt of electricity creep through my veins.
"I broke up with her."
"But she-"
"I know what she said."
"Oh."
"Ya", Mike said bluntly, his words floating through my ears.
"Why?"
"Why what?"
"Why did you break up with her?"
"I don't know."
I pursed my lips together, wanting to convey everything to him with the sound of my voice, but thwarted by the familiar dark cloud that circled. The same dark cloud that made my insides judder so quickly it felt like I was suffocating. The same dark cloud that made my heart fall to my chest at the slightest hint of sadness in Mike's voice. The same dark cloud that I was now sure Mike could feel too.
"Yes you do." I said, with a hint of interrogation etching through my voice.
"Can we talk about something else?" Mike said suddenly frustrated, aggressively lifting his head to look up at the faraway mountains that stood in-front of us. He peered at the familiar hills as they stood still, his eyes traced over the edges, analyzing the curves and the beauty of the grassy green. He sat and stared, close enough to enjoy the sight, but far-away enough away that he never needed to know what rested behind those peaking hills of grey and brown.
"What's your favorite song?" I asked coolly, resisting the urge to let my gaze intersect with Mike's. He broke his train of thought and gave a small laugh.
And it was really nice to hear him laugh.
"Don't judge me."
"You? Never."
"Promise?"
"Would you like me to pinky swear?" I asked, with a small chuckle. I held my hand up ready to promise, urging Mike to respond.
"Unnecessary." He said, swatting my hand away with his.
"Then tell me."
"Fine, it's... "
"Go on...." I ushered.
"Ugh it's Brown Eyed Girl," Mike said in defeat, turning his face to gauge my reaction. Instantly I watched as he noticed my smile and rolled his eyes, and I laughed as my laugh started to paint it's way onto his face. "Haha very funny, anyway it's Brown Eyed Girl and it's by-"
"Van Morrison", I finished, smiling and nodding my head. I turned anxiously and finally let my eyes collapse into his. I took a nervous inhale and I felt the grin run away from my face, "you do know, El has brown eyes."
Mike continued to smile at the floor and shrugged his shoulders,
"Ya." He said, shrugging.
"So do you."