Faith

When the Nightmares Come

Ariana lay beside Sawyer, her rest had been fitful, and now she was wide awake.  She'd woke in a cold sweat gasping for air.  Ever since her conversation with her father, she couldn't shake the anxious feeling that tied her stomach in knots.  The prospect of heading back to Boston, of potentially coming face to face with Sean terrified her.  She missed her parents so much - the thought of spending time with them warmed her heart, but could she face going back home, when every time she thought about it she felt Sean Devveny's hand around her throat? 

She turned and hugged her pillow close to her chest, burying her head under the soft duvet.  Maybe she just wasn't ready to go back?  But maybe the longer she put it off, the worse it would be when she finally did?  Whenever Ariana had left Boston, she hadn't actually made a conscious decision to stay away.  She just knew that she had to get out of town for her sanity. 

After they'd finished, Sean was turning up all the time at the family home, and when he wasn't there he was ringing; her dad even got the police involved towards the end.  Not that law enforcement had ever bothered or deterred Sean...  Whenever Ariana went to school she would see his car drive past.  Whenever she went to work, he'd conveniently stop in, making out as if it wasn't to either intimidate her, or to try to get her back, or both...  But she knew it was. 

Eventually, she'd decided that the best way forward was to make a life for herself outside of Boston and away from Sean.  She just needed to wait for her teaching qualification, then she could escape the memories that haunted her and the living reminder that was never too far away.  Initially her parents were dead set against the idea:  Ariana was too fragile and vulnerable after everything that had happened, and the last thing that Perter and Louise wanted for their daughter was to be out in a strange place with strange people.  She needed her family around her after Sean. 

Ariana eventually managed to reason with them that it was the best thing she could do to stop Sean ruling her life.  She wanted to make a clean break and get out there into the world and start living! She felt like she'd already missed out on so much during the time she'd been with Sean, and she didn't want to lose out on anything else.  And that was when the decision was made to go to California - she'd read in an online forum for newly-qualified teachers that there was a high demand in California at the moment due to increased numbers of schools in the suburbs.  Ariana established that Cali would be a good fit for her: the weather seemed nice, there was a young vibe around the place, culturally it would give her a lot of new experiences and opportunities to meet new people with similar interests.  Despite her parents still being entirely anxious about her decision, she was doing it!  Ariana was packing up and moving cross-country to start an exciting and fulfilling new life in California and to leave the tears of Boston behind her. 

What she certainly never reckoned on was getting very lost and then breaking down in Montana before she reached the West Coast.  And the part that she would have laughed in someone's face if they'd told her three months earlier was that she'd fall madly in love with a handsome cowboy and actually enjoy living in the countryside! 

Ariana understood why her dad felt uncomfortable that she was suddenly involved with a man, a few years her senior, whom he had never met.  She knew that introducing her father to Sawyer was the right thing to do - the last thing Ariana wanted was to cause her parents any more grief.  She knew they'd been worried sick when she was with Sean.  She cringed as she thought about the countless times her dad had told her it was never too late to walk away... 

Ariana's brother was in the Forces, and even after a tour of Iraq, she was pretty sure she'd still given her folks more sleepless nights than he had.  Ariana felt guilty about what she'd put them through she never wanted to upset anyone.  All Ariana wanted was for everyone to feel comfortable and be happy.