It puts me in a state of depressive death, as if I'm passing away, aware that I'm no longer coexistent with everyone around me.
As if I'm slipping away into death, nothing but shades of blue, black, and gray to whisk me in deeper in this sleep like state.
Blinding myself by memories to mask death to keep myself calm, dreaming, but I'm really passing on to the next adventure.
The adventure, the next chapter in soul soaring extravagance, the undeniable feeling that what you once knew is just a small dot in the emptiness that is life.
In the end, this ultimate wisdom is nothing but the meager instinct, that your always searching for a home, that you are searching for home..
Nothing can cause this instinctive feeling to go away. The more you let yourself zone in the more you fall deeper into auto pilot, letting your mind take over, like a bird flying south for the winter. You find yourself consuming knowledge that if alive, you'd never attain. Only in death can you gain this ultimate wisdom.
